Nur Ein V Round Four "'Not In This Lifetime"

[glennny]

i don't get the connection. i listened to "Imprint After".
I was hoping you would say " oh man I sent in the wrong mix" then we'd all say "send in the right one!"
As it is it's very distracting for me, I hate to see you go on a technical issue.
Maybe it'll work for the judges?
I've never had a problem with your mixes until now, they're usually stellar to my ears.
cool song none the less!

[phetal]

thanks. yeah i um. I sent in the wrong mix!...

I hate to see me go on that too, and I kinda know I will. Freaking awesome songs guys.

A song like Talamak, or better yet Freak Love is what i was referring to. Though yeah I mean I don't even come close to that... It really just was done waaaay too quickly, with very tired ears. I can post a much better mix if judges don't mind. obviously I don't expect that version to be judged, but yeah... the song is better than oooOOMFooooOOMF forever.

[Lunkhead]

I assumed it was intentional, and it didn't bother me. But since I'm not a judge, that's probably not much consolation.

[MintyHandy]

I had a dream once, that ended with us all going oooOOMFooooOOMF forever.

no, even I don't know what I meant by that

[glennny]

thus far I've only listened on headphones. perhaps it would sound a lot better on a system with big speakers. I'll check that out tonight.

[phetal]

I had a dream once, that ended with us all going oooOOMFooooOOMF forever.

I have the same dream, frequently.

And yeah, a LARGE amount of that oooOOMF is intended. Just not like... 0-11. more like 3-11. Glad you guys like it. I'm gonna do reviews for real this week. IN LIKE... 3 HOURS?

[JonPorobil]

Reviews! [Disclaimer: my opinion doesn't count.]

Berkeley Social Scene - There's a lot about this track that rubs me the wrong way, to be honest. It starts with the vocals. Is that Sam singing, or Glennny? Sounds like he's near the top of his range, and the voice sounds very thin and lonely in the mix. It also sounds like there's some missed notes, which is surprising for a BSS track, so maybe there was a time crunch or something? The modulation from minor to major for the chorus doesn't strike me right, either. And, on a more subjective note, this whole thing feels a little too overproduced for its subject matter. If a guy's singing about how hard life has screwed him over, and how tough it is to be reduced to begging on the sidewalk, then I would expect it to be more intimate, and not accompanied by a full rock band. Maybe that's just me. It's also a little jarring how the chorus switches from the dialogue mode ("Sorry to stop you, I won't take that much time") into the narrative ("Then without pausing...") - that kind of thing works great on paper, but comes off less fluent in performance. So yeah, there's some issues here. On the plus side, Glennny still rocks the heck out of that eBow.

Billy's Little Trip - This segues neatly from the BSS track. The vocals are loose, which normally works for you, but the saxomaphone is also playing a little loose (it sounds fake, but it also sounds off-key... is that possible?), so the combination of the two doesn't work very well. The verses have some interesting stuff going on, and though the melody is somewhat tenuous, the performance has plenty enough oomph to sell it. The chorus, on the other hand, seems like haphazardly cliches strung together. Like, we were given a cliche for a title, and you decided to combine that with "What you see is what you get," and then played with how those two fit together, when the combination of the two is actually kind of unintuitive. I don't know why, but it feels to me like those two sayings just don't go together very well. Totally subjective. I wish you'd let your lead guitar abilities speak for themselves. Between Steve's trumpet last week and the sax this week, I'm starting to wonder whether you still have faith in your own ability to carry a song with your axe. Shred a little, dude! It's what you're good at! One bit of positive reinforcement I feel compelled to give, because no one ever notices stuff like this - your bass playing is solid. Always is, but this track especially.

Boop Boop - When I saw the lyrics, I expected a rap. What I got was this kind of dance-revival genre piece mixed with grunge guitars, and I'm not sure what to make of it. You probably have the catchiest chorus in the whole fight, but on the third line of the chorus (every time!), it sounds like you didn't quite hit that highest falsetto note. The pauses in between the first two lines of each verse seem to invite some kind of instrumental fill, but instead we get more nebulous vamping. I don't mind the vamping when it serves as the music bed, but when you give it room to breathe, it seems murky. I'm really just nitpicking here; this is my favorite entry of this fight. As I remarked in the lyrics thread, I really like your lyrics. You're really good at nailing different genres with all these bells and whistles. You've gone from a vocoded electronica piece with vintage synths, to a flamenco song IN SPANISH, to an ambient electronic piece with right-wing radio samples, to a freaking Sesame Street-style counting song, to THIS. Even if I haven't like most of these, it's an incredible musical journey, and I wouldn't be the least bit surprised, at this point, to see you take the title home.

Chris Cogott - Someone's trying to take a step or two into BLT's territory, eh? This rocks harder than most of your previous entries. Man, I wish I could figure out how you get your acoustic guitars to sound like that. So lush, so full. The vocals, on the other hand, are a little weak in the mix. I feel like the vox in the verse could benefit from some judicious doubling. The lyrics here are a little one-note and sappy, but you keep the mix moving, the instruments well-tracked, the arrangement well-paced and always moving. I also really like your use of the sample. Rather than building the whole song around it, you just used it as a fill between verses. Nice touch. Also, that guitar solo is totally 80s. The only things holding me back from this topping my list are the lyrics and genre bias.

Jon Eric - Round 4 was where I got eliminated last year. I took 10th out of 10. I very nearly fell victim to a similar mistake - writing a boring song. This is a crucial stage in the game, and About halfway through recording, I looked up and said "Wait a second... this SUCKS." Scrapped my idea and came up with this instead. Last year I knew I was dead in the water. This year I'll be even more disappointed if I don't make it through this round.

Milo Dunderville - The idea I scrapped used that same chord progression, by the way. I barely touching on V before finishing on vi. Your song would have kicked mine's butt. Glad I switched ideas. This is beautifully executed. The drums are great punctuation here without overwhelming the mix of what should (and, I think, is) an organically mournful piece. The mandolin accents are neat, though they create this moment of cognitive dissonance - "He just said he'd never play the mandolin, but there it is, in chorus no less!" These lyrics scan wonderfully, though I wonder if they might even be too melodramatic. The first verse has me hooked, and then the chorus makes me start wondering "Come on, now, NEVER? Really?" But, of course, there's many old-style troubador ballads that do exactly this, and I'm sure that's what you were going for. I dunno, I don't doubt the judges will respond to it pretty well, so I'm just a cynical twenty-something griping. Good job. Also, probably the best use of the sample this whole round.

Minty Handy - This is a neat little middle ground between the tongue-in-cheek quality of your early stuff and the (probably overly-)sentimental tone of last week's entry. You also used the sample well, though I would have preferred it to lead into the chorus, but not the verses. Over the second verse, is that a continuation of the sample I hear? Or did you record your own vibrophone part to make it sound more seamless? Awesome. The song is short, but comes near to wearing out its welcome because it doesn't have much motion. I know it's a lot to ask for a week long competition (and I know I'm guilty of it myself this week), but if your standards aren't high, then what do you have to shoot for, y'know? I feel like you not only have to start from a good idea, but that good idea has to palpably evolve over the course of the song, and it has to evolve into another idea which is as good as or better than the original idea, and that's a ton of thinking we all need to do to make it work, but the best songs are worth the effort. I feel like your entry last week had motion like this (it was narrative-driven, which makes it a little easier), but you could avoid the song stagnating if it felt like each line of the lyrics built on the previous one towards some kind of point. It's a hard concept to explain because it's so abstract, so let me know if you'd like me to attempt to explain better.

Sid Dennison - Of course, there are exceptions to the rule I just laid out for Minty Handy. There's nothing like a good screw-you punk song. This chorus is really catchy, too. There are two problems with this song, though: 1.) Most screw-you punk songs sound the same, and this doesn't do a whole to differentiate itself. And of course 2.) You barely used the challenge. And in fact, you fobbed it off in such a way as to toss aside the whole notion of the non-optional challenge. You wrote a decent song with that attitude, but I'm concerned whether the jury will see it your way.

Therman - You and Who Fly both had such incredibly out-there uses of the challenge that I'm a little envious of the creativity involved. It never even occurred to me to slow it down that far, or to reverse it. Never even entered my realm of ideas. This is a nice little b-side, or maybe the ballad that the major label made you put on there, and even though you never really liked it, it turns into your biggest hit and a bunch of teenage girls uy your album and then throw it away when they find out it's mostly distorted grunge songs. Wow, I took that metaphor too far. Anyway. You handle this subgenre quite well, and you've got a pretty much perfect rock-star voice, but I can't help but feel like you're a little out of your element, without having a full-band arrangement. This has a ton of pathos, but isn't very catchy, so I'd probably need to listen to it a bunch more times before I was able to remember it. That's not necessarily a bad thing, though I probably won't keep coming back to it. I can see how someone might, though. Enjoy your immunity.

Who Fly - So, your mix has already been discussed a little... For what it's worth, this track would have been AWESOME in my book if that same fade-in-fade-out effect had been applied to everything except the lead vocal. As it is, you're lucky that it managed to leave most of the lyrics discernible. Unfortunately, the constant fading out makes this nearly unlistenable. I'll be sorry to see you go, but it seems you're probably first in line for the chopping block this week.

The only entry that REALLY stands out for me this week is Boop Boop. Milo and Chris aren't too shabby either.

Edit: possible cuts this week... Who Fly is the (sorry!) obvious cut, but I'm worried for BSS and Sid Dennison, too. Which of the two it winds up being will depend on how much weight the judges give the challenge.

[phetal]

Berkley Social Scene - What is the music trying to make me feel here? My eyes are wide, then my face is scrunchy, then my head's back and nodding and I wanna be stoned as fuck. That guitar is really great for a second but i wish the sound evolved a bit… just on those long notes, if there was more texture. Great vocals, you're really believable. Nice use of the sample. It fits. I still don't know how I feel, but I liked the tune, a lot, per usual.

BLT - If you opened a show with this (and this version, as recorded) I would love you. If you played this song 6 or 8 songs into the set I might be disappointed. I didn't hear the sample until the third or fourth time through, and oh boy does it not work. It's mostly okay though because that sax is crazy. Another song I like. Good job. Not great. Just good.

Boop Boop - if it all were less of a blur this would be a mixtape track. Textedit made "mixtape" into "mixture." A potent mixture. I'm feeling loveydrinky. The sample is well used. I like your voice when it's high. I like it when it's low. I like it all the time. I'd like to be able to hear it better. At least away from all those guitars. Wanna step outside for a minute?

Chris Cogott - This is hella catchy. Radio-ready. But you keep it fresh. Lovin the guitar scribbz. Well mixed. Your drums are great. You do a bundle of silly little things in this that are both my favorite and least favorite parts of the song. Much like the "RA RA AH AH AH" part of Bad Romance by lady gaga but NOTHING like that song. Mostly nothing. Great song. High fives. Congratulations. You're goin' to college.

Jon Eric - If you feel like rapping let me know because then I'll have you scratch my back with your production skills too sir. This song is a fucking jam and it never tries to BUMP but my head and feet are going fuckin crazy and that is achieved by catchiness and a really REALLY high quality production job. You can tell you're on a budget like us all but you make it work for you 99 percent. Nobody's perfect. Your musical intent is conveyed with great clarity and that's the biggest challenge of any producer. Ace job. All around.

Milo Dunderville - SENIOR DON GATO WAS A CAT. ON A HIGH RED ROOF DON GATO SAT! Ohhhhkay it's not really like that song at all but man that's ALL I could OH NO WAIT ROOOOOLLAND THE THOMPSON GUNNER… yeaaaaahhh that's it! Maybe. Zevon+Gato+Cohen?

Minty Hooooo- No offense, the best do it all the time but "face to face" should never be the first line in the song. It works though because the song just keeps going uphill from there… and quickly. Nice use of the sample. A lil RIGHT THERE in the mix. Your song is stuck in my head more than most of the others. But don't take that as too much of a compliment, it's not like DAMN I NEED MORE it's like "bah! can't shake it!" Still. Good work.

Sid and the Harpooners - PLAY NEAR ME LIVE. Great energy. This is really not up my alley as far as recorded music. A little uninteresting. Someone said "let me plead genre bias" about someone's song last week and I'm gonna recycle that here. But live I would be all about it. Or if my roommates weren't here, listening with me. Great energy.

Therman - Good use of the sample. You took the easy way out, like me, making your song around the sample primarily. Your guitar is nice, simple, but the real emotional pull in this song comes from the atmosphere of that sample and your voice. I think it's a shame you buried it after a while. It's nice atmosphere but it doesn't reappear as prominently as I'd like. And for what you DID do with it, you stopped short of doing a lot else that you hinted at, at least atmospherically. Kinda tough to say what because it's artistic choice, but it all left me pining for more aberrations, like that 'haunted-ww2-wreckage-at-the-bottom-of-the-sea' SCRAWWWGG that makes me feel like sigourney weaver. Another great song. Maybe best suited for dawson's creek. I mean that lovingly.

Whofly - oooOOMMFFooooOOMMFF. sorry.

Edit: Ohhhh and. I see myself and... If it were my call I'd say berkeley going this week. Love you dudes but your song really left me feeling weird this week. Or Milo, just cuz of the hella goofy associations I have with that song now.

[glennny]

BSS- This is glennny on lead vocals. I am the 5th best vocalist in the band, so usually we’d seek another before me, but I had the vision for the song in the time to do it. I’m very fond of this track we got the sample pure, harmonized, modulated, modulated and harmonized, broken down from 6/8 into 4/4. All that and it’s a wild ride, it’s just delightful to my ears, but I’m way too close to it. The boys freaking rocked their parts! I expected some vocal critiques, but I do think they are good for me. I’m hoping the judges are in to it. I think we clearly pass on, but again I’m not objective.

8- Chris Cogott- Very cool song! You top my list with an adequate use of the sample that sounds like it belongs. Not the most inventive use of the sample but fitting! Production is great! The lyrics do nothing for me, but they are fine. Best guitar solo wins you this place on top. Nice song structure!

7- Minty Handy- Serious Minty Handy is still strange, but it’s great. I like the use of the sample, it sounds like a choice for the song. The backing vocals are really nice! It almost sounds like Chris Cogott on backing vocals. Cool song, pretty safe, not very ambitious.

6- Milo Dunderville- What a great voice! Again the sample fits, but doesn’t seem to really fit with the rest of the instrumentation timbre wise. This is a very pretty song. Excellent oohs! Tasty drums this time too! Nice dynamics in the 3rd verse dropping the drums! I don’t really care much for the lyrics, but they are fine.

5- Boop Boop- Well here’s the stadium rock I was waiting for! I do have a big problem with the sample. It seems to be used as an incidental arpeggio and the rhythm of the sample grates with the 4/4 of the rock song. I love gamelan, but this doesn’t sound like the intention. I think the song would be stronger without it, but then it wouldn’t meet the challenge. I think the song is too awesome for that to hurt you too much. Also, you can write a much better ending than this petering out one you got.

4- Sid Denison- Terrible use of the sample. I’m worried for you. These sound like place holder lyrics, with the vulgarity. I usually start vulgar and then replace with substance. That said, this is fun and fast and a little fun. Not very clever especially compared with how clever we all know you can be.

3- Jon Eric- I guess you used the sample. It’s tweaked beyond recognition. However the result is a nice infectious piano line. Oh wait it is in the mix, man it’s my 5th listen and I finally heard it. I thought you twisted it into the piano line. My issue with this song is it goes nowhere, I’ve heard it all in the 1st 30 seconds. Pretty good vocal performance, but still wrought with Jon Eric pitchiness. Lyrics are good. Although “not in this life time, maybe the next” I expected to hear in every song.

2- BLT- This is a tough one. The groove is good, the sax sounds great! I love the delivery in the vocal performance, but ultimately I don’t hear a melody to grab on to. Then there’s the sample which again sounds incidental and not much a part of the music. I hate to see you go, but I’m worried for you!

1- Who Fly- Trying to ignore the production issue which is incredibly difficult to ignore, I like this song. I always love your vocals. This is a nice trippy hoppy piece of background music. I think the sample was sped up and made into that middle bit. For this genre 2:25 is painfully short. I think this should be 6 minutes and go many more places. Ignoring the weird production issue this sounds like the beginning of a song, but not the full thing. I’m worried for you, but it seems like a fatal mistake.

[frankie big face]

Posting lyrics is good, people! (this means you, BSS)

http://www.songfight.net/forums/viewtop ... f=5&t=7376

[glennny]

posted.

sorry FBF!

[JonPorobil]

Milo Dunderville - SENIOR DON GATO WAS A CAT. ON A HIGH RED ROOF DON GATO SAT! Ohhhhkay it's not really like that song at all but man that's ALL I could

'TWAS A LOOOOOVE NOTE FOOOOOOR DON GATO.

Man, I was starting to think that I was the only person in the world who had to listen to that song in elementary school.

[glennny]

Phetal wrote:

What is the music trying to make me feel here?

How are you supposed to feel? It’s good if you feel somewhat disturbed. Though I hope it’s as a function of drama doing its job. I was thinking about a very close friend of mine while making this song. He’s not a smart guy and has been homeless off and on over the 18 years I’ve known him. He’s one of the best musicians I’ve ever met, I gave him a job for 4 of those years and he lived in my garage for a while too. (he’s in a shelter these days). I was focusing on some of his homeless stories, such as the food that gets thrown out in San Francisco can be amazingly good. Also despite the rage and shame within him, when he begs for change he’s got to put on the nice face when asking. Hence the minor to major change. He was a bike messenger for a while and was hit by a car, losing the use of his leg for about a year (he’s recovered). So I made him a vet, there’s more of them (if you believe their signs), and made it morphine instead of speed, as the drug that contributed to his fall.

Thanks for the review! I recommend repeated listens. It's a lot to digest, it makes more and more sense with each listen.

Jon Eric wrote:

If a guy's singing about how hard life has screwed him over, and how tough it is to be reduced to begging on the sidewalk, then I would expect it to be more intimate, and not accompanied by a full rock band.

I don’t think you need to have street musician production to tell the story. The rock band is in his mind after all. My friend doesn’t speak very well either, but he’ll exhilarate you and make you cry if he gets behind a drum kit or you hand him an electric guitar. I too am frustrated with the limits of the written word, I feel much more like I’ve expressed myself when I play guitar. So hopefully it is an emotional ride for the listener.
You write a fair review, though i don't think i missed any notes. Thanks for the e-bow compliment! You're shredding the piano these days too! Sounds like when and if we ever collaborate you play piano and I'll play e-bow, we won't let each other sing then we get Ross to sing or something.

thanks for the review!

[Ross]

man there's a lot of good songs this round. I don't envy the poor judges that have to try to rank this.......oh.....wait.......crap.

[JonPorobil]

Reist, is there only one iteration of the sample in your song?

[Ross]

Sounds like when and if we ever collaborate you play piano and I'll play e-bow, we won't let each other sing then we get Ross to sing or something.

I'm in.

[Reist]

Reist, is there only one iteration of the sample in your song?

That was initially my intent. But once I determined to make the song a little longer, I had to mess with it a little bit.

[Spintown]

http://spintown79.blogspot.com/2010/05/ ... eview.html

My Favorites:

Sid Denison & The Harpooners - Hated the intro, but then got over it once the music started. I love telling people to fuck off, so this song is a win.

Boop Boop - Liked the story/message of the song. Sounds like something I'd have listened to in the 80's.

Chris Cogott - Loved the production, but but found myself not really paying attention to the lyrics....don't know why. Just sort of jamming to it as I did other things. It was fun doing an air guitar bit towards the end.

Not Bad:

Jon Eric - Although not great, one of the better vocal performances I've heard from you. Nice work.

Billy's Little Trip - Not bad, but not grabbing me yet. Liked it more the 2nd listen, so maybe it'll grow on me.

[JonPorobil]

You write a fair review, though i don't think i missed any notes.

On repeated listens, you "miss" the same notes in the same way each time they come up, so it's more likely that you're singing the melody correctly, but it clashes with the instrumentation in some way. The ones I'm talking about are all in the chorus: The first syllable of "Sorry," the upward slide on the word "ask" (which hits the right note eventually, but has to edge up into it), and the first syllable of the word "pausing."

Thanks for the e-bow compliment! You're shredding the piano these days too! Sounds like when and if we ever collaborate you play piano and I'll play e-bow, we won't let each other sing then we get Ross to sing or something.

thanks for the review!

Well now I guess we gotta.

[MintyHandy]

I feel like you not only have to start from a good idea...

Yeah, that's been my problem every time (except 97), so far. I'm forcing out the ideas. So everything you said, I'm *totally* with ya, and hoping that maybe this time around (assuming I'm still in it) I'll get a good idea to start from.

Serious Minty Handy is still strange...

I'm still getting used to it, myself. I kind of creep myself out when I hear my own vocals. But! Music, like life, is a journey. I promise that if I get an idea for something silly, I won't suppress it just 'cuz it's Nur Ein. For the record though, if I could get the songs in my head out and into the air, you'd hear something a lot more like Frank Zappa than Minty Handy. All you get to hear is the stuff I have the tools (ie skills and talent) to express -- which ain't much.

[Caravan Ray]

You barely used the challenge. And in fact, you fobbed it off in such a way as to toss aside the whole notion of the non-optional challenge.

4- Sid Denison- Terrible use of the sample.

I disagree most vehemently!

Sure, I could have taken the easy option and used the sample as a melodic part of the song, but instead I used the sample as a metaphor for the multitude of petty societal norms and mores that can act to crush the soul. The sample is absolutely intrinsic to the song. Sid is an "Everyman", railing against this tyranny, and in doing so becomes almost a Christ-like figure. He refuses to be "The Ice Cream Man". In Sid we see hope. Beauty. Love. He puts his foot down and stands up for what he believes in, which is what makes this more than just a song, it is a powerful illustration of the triumph of the human spirit. With swearing.

[MintyHandy]

Sid is an "Everyman", railing against this tyranny, and in doing so becomes almost a Christ-like figure. He refuses to be "The Ice Cream Man". In Sid we see hope. Beauty. Love. He puts his foot down and stands up for what he believes in, which is what makes this more than just a song, it is a powerful illustration of the triumph of the human spirit. With swearing.

I wish someone else had written this, just so you could use it in your sig without looking narcissistic.