The Song Fight Bulletin Board

As far as I can tell no one did a song about their copy of the Sunny Day Real Estate classic album.

glennny wrote:As far as I can tell no one did a song about their copy of the Sunny Day Real Estate classic album.

Nick seemed to be flirting with the idea, but never actually took it that far.

dutova - I am a such a sucker for this. I was skeptical until the second voice came in. I would listen to this outside the contest, which is probably the highest compliment possible. Great vocals and harmonies, and it's stripped down just enough to make it all fall together. If I had to complain, it would be with the mastering - the acoustic guitar is particularly piercing. Maybe the drums could expand from the simple kick when the guitar gets more intense.

dj ranger den - lol lyrics. Nice song! I like the build up. Not to jinx you, but I think this might be your year, because you're apparently IN THE ZONE. Full of confidence and energy. Great work!

balance lost - Fun song - I particularly like the bass and rocking out. The page turn effect is unique and clever. I am no lyrical expert but the lyrics don't really connect with me.

a tous les monsieurs - Frankie and you got a 2-for-1 deal on a capella groups? Love the swing feel. The instrumentation is excellent, particularly the drums. I think the vocals are good, but maybe could ham it up a bit to complete the genre feel.

cavedwellers - Awesome intro and clean mix. The mouth smacking between lyric lines bugs me. The chorus mix kind of hurts my ears - the tambo is too high. I like the composition except for the weird instruments in the bridge. The singing gets really good at the end, which makes me think someone didn't warm up. I really enjoy how it builds up. For a slow song, you've pulled it off well.

nick soma - Cool, poppy song. I appreciate the key change and the shooby do-wops. The lyrics are pretty wacky for me.

frankie big face - Is this the no-instruments round already? MAKING LOVE IN THE NUDE WHO DOES THAT? I really like the drumming. It seems that you're doing more zany stuff this year, which at least keeps a smile on my face and the judges entertained. The breaks are appreciated accents on a catchy tune.

carlo bruno jr - Straight off the oldies station with some of Carlo's signature spice in it. Thoroughly well executed, but reminds me of songs that I don't find particularly appealing.

The Chocolate Chips - Oh, good, you fulfilled the title and challenge in the first 10 seconds. You have one of the more interesting and poppy songs this week. For such an electronic-feeling song, there are some parts where the beat kind of falls a little loose, which seems out of place. I like the harmonies a lot. The change feels like a bit of a letdown after the build-up.

ken mahru - I like the direction you've taken lately. This song doesn't feel particularly innovative, but it's well executed like a nicer Weezer. I particularly like the dancing bass line.

inflatable vegetables - Super weird. I think you made the song you wanted to and probably executed it the right way. I am simply incapable of giving useful feedback on this piece. It reminds me a little bit of Hard 'n Phirm's Pi, but without the non-sequiter white boy rap in the middle.

adam adamant - I like what you're going for - with the techno and slide guitar. The mix hurts a little - the vocals could take a step (or two) back and some reverb. I know this isn't production fight, but I'd say that hurts your song the most.

michael j samuels - There are some interesting things happening here, which I can appreciate. I'm glad that it's building toward a beat, but perhaps not quick and steady enough. Cute take on the challenge. I think you fulfilled your lyrics and I think... this surprisingly works well. It might be the most emotional song here. Every listen makes it better.

paco del stinko - A fantastic Paco Del Stinko take on this title. Sweet harmonies and an equally sweet bass line are what I will remember of this one. The drums and rhythm guitar are kind of plain, but the guitar solo is badass and makes me vaguely jealous that my fingers will never move that quickly.

rabid garfunkel - Nice beat. Weird vocals. Bad mix. Some interesting things going on but they're hard to appreciate in the background behind things that really don't need so much attention.

manhattan glutton - I WILL PERFORM THIS LIVE AND IT WILL BE GLORIOUS. As for this recording... could be better.

cavedwellers - Awesome intro and clean mix.

Thanks man! That's like Ken saying "nice drums" or Paco saying "nice guitar playing.
Sorry about the mouth smacking, that's my fault. With more time with the vocals I would have tried to get a handle on that.

Everyone did a great job! I'm really enjoying this group of songs!

Frankie's song is plenty different, but I can't help busting into Venus : "Venus if you will, please send a little girl for me to thrill...." during the verses.

I think Ken's is my favorite, but I LOVE Paco's and Balance Lost entry also! Lots of good stuff guys and gal!

W.A.I.L. I.A.A.C.

AA - someone else said 'Loser' and I hear that. Everyone else said over-bearing amplification of the vocal and I sadly hear that too. Them's some ugly harmonies too, which to be me is the biggest crime. That said, I like the song it wants to be a lot. I just can't listen to it all the way through (and this is fourth attempt). Sorry, I got old.

BL - There's some lovely guitaring in here. You fell for the cardinal sin of not rhyming "Stephen" with "Thievin'". It has some cute comments, but that's all it is, a check-list of 'cute'. Love that solo, mind. You play down to a point I could only reach up for!

CBJ - Not my fav. CBJ I have to say. The yacht-rock mood is not saved by your eccentric take on it. It sounds like a Style Council B-side if someone took the keyboards off. Actually that doesn't sound too bad

CD - I really liked your last round entry. This sounds like a 90s Indie Band deciding to 'have a go at the Carpenters'. The lyric sounds heartfelt but it's all a bit clumsy. The chorus harmony is great, mind. I drifted off somewhere through the first chorus and only periodically resurfaced until the next song coast line loomed into view. At which point I paddled as fast as I could.

DuToVa - Yeah I like this a lot. the only problem for me is the chorus is not that powerful (in that the melody is not that impactive as written, not that it's in any way badly performed). Not much else to say, nicely done.

FBF - No-one says 'shagging' since Mike Myers ruined it for us. Lovely. Feels a little bit throwaway, or rather an clever exercise, a story for the sake of it? Super-pleasing on the ear, mind.

IV - I should probably like this more than I do. It should be ticking all my boxes - all that inventiveness and relentless fun pouring out of every pore. Voice sounds good this time out as well. However, overall I find it irritating. Why? Possibly the hard rhymes on diary that suggest the whole lyric was written from those chorus rhymes up. Which makes everything else seem self-consciously wacky. Hmmm.

KM - These words were so creepy and angry I thought at first I must have accidentally skipped to Manhattan Glutton by mistake this is a good song, well recorded and your voice continues to impress. Is it packed with inventiveness and genre-defining moves? No, but it's catchy enough.

MG - This is a good idea (melodically) stretched to breaking point. It just can't support its length. I wanted to get that out the way first, as otherwise this was a pleasant listen, for '90s grunge band has heard Radiohead for the first time and realises they can go soft as well' moment. I find something particularly galling about 'a little sugar for the tragedy' when you repeat it. Ah got it, it's a lyric about writing songs. Hate that meta-shit. Around about 'dadadadadadaddiary' I reach breaking point, which is a shame I think it's a good idea for a song, needing a far more efficient arrangement.

MJS - This is f*cking awesome in a weird Depeche Mode take on the Residents way, only it's much, much too long for what it is, as it doesn't really evolve enough to support it. But it is a brilliant mad idea, and I hope it's not a death-knell but a new direction!

PdS - I think this is my favourite, apart from the weird (but good) take on the title. Somehow that weird slightly slurry take on the vocal adds to the 'Secret Agent Man' vibe ... I guess I never got excited by spies so I don't engage as much. But yeah, this is cracking.

RG - Another song let down by an appalling mix. The music / background sounds so awesome but I am struggling to make it out. That should be screaming at the forefront with the vocals struggling to be heard. Then this would possibly my favourite Nur Ein song ever. As it is, it squits along in the background to a point I can barely make out its brilliance. And I get to hear your Lux Interior impression. Which isn't bad, ftr.

CC - I don't disagree with your opening sentiment This is a pretty song, and i like the moog-ish-ness of the keyboard. It's a little languid for personal tastes but there's definitely nothing to dislike here. And I like the melody as well. Yeah it's only the soporific feel that stops me embracing this fully.

ATLM - Yeah, same review from last time. It's lovely and well performed, but it makes me think of when Frank Sinatra Jr turns up on Family Guy ...

DJRD - This would have been my favourite had it been in the vote, I think. It features all that self-consciously quirky stuff I dislike about DJRD songs I dislike, but hey that first line is the best take on the title. And it's so lovely to listen to. And is actually saying something (whether or not I agree with it). Keep it up, keep it up!

Nick Soma - Fun and bouncy but you could easily have cut out the penultimate verse and chorus and made this better, pithier. It drags towards a punchline you see coming from the end of the first verse, and by the end you're kind of desperate for it to come and put you out your pleasure misery. A little bittle monotonal, in other words. But a good monotone, one must admit.

j$ wrote: FBF - No-one says 'shagging' since Mike Myers ruined it for us. Lovely. Feels a little bit throwaway, or rather an clever exercise, a story for the sake of it? Super-pleasing on the ear, mind.

If it helps, you may set the song in the 1970s. And anyway, it's not just "shagging," it's "shagging IN THE LOO." Of course, the whole song is a gag, so you know, just laugh and enjoy it.

glennny wrote:Frankie's song is plenty different, but I can't help busting into Venus : "Venus if you will, please send a little girl for me to thrill...." during the verses.

Heh!! That is exactly the urge that hit me too.

Did you realise the similarity was there Frank?

Caravan Ray wrote:

glennny wrote:Frankie's song is plenty different, but I can't help busting into Venus : "Venus if you will, please send a little girl for me to thrill...." during the verses.

Heh!! That is exactly the urge that hit me too.

Did you realise the similarity was there Frank?

Aw, dammit. I secretly PM'd Glen to say I knew "some old guy" would call me out. But I never thought there were two old guys in this game. I did notice the similarity but said fuck it and ran with it anyway.

frankie big face wrote:

Caravan Ray wrote:

glennny wrote:Frankie's song is plenty different, but I can't help busting into Venus : "Venus if you will, please send a little girl for me to thrill...." during the verses.

Heh!! That is exactly the urge that hit me too.

Did you realise the similarity was there Frank?

Aw, dammit. I secretly PM'd Glen to say I knew "some old guy" would call me out. But I never thought there were two old guys in this game. I did notice the similarity but said fuck it and ran with it anyway.

I was impressed. You normally sound like old David Bowie songs, so you seem to be making progress!

(BTW: I did actually score you very highly - the lyrics were wonderful).

Apologies to all competitors actually - I have been very slack with reviews - will try to get something done soon.

Adam Adamant - Cool slide lick and bass rumble. Didn't dig the vocal much.

Balance Lost - Digging the chorus. That line about social media caught my ear.

Carl Bruno Jr. - Reminded me of 70's band Bread for some reason. I enjoyed the bass line. Liked the song better on second listen.

Cavedwellers - Well constructed story line. (That's a good angle in pigfarmer jargon.) I like the arrangement. I think your harmony lines are excellent. This is a well sung song.

DuToVa - I think the vocals are very good after the first harmony section. Excellent from that part onward. They may be just a bit timid before (at least in comparison.) I like the arrangement well enough. Your metaphor might be just a hair strained, but I like it.

Frankie Big Face - Nice change of pace. Not sure I bought in 100% but I liked it. I think you do a good job of making choruses really stand out.

Inflatable Vegetables - Another song I liked more on second listen. You've done a good job with the doubled vocal and I liked that bass line.

Ken Mahru - A nice little piece of pop rock. Good arrangement with the drop out and build back up there at the end.

Manhattan Glutton - Again a good job with the doubled vocal throughout. You're melody and vocal performance(s) are enticing.

Michael J. Samuels - I liked this to start but just a bit into it and I became a bit bored. By the end I was wishing it was over.

Nick Soma - I like the melody. Something about the harmony before the chorus that doesn't quite work as well as it should. But I liked it during the chorus quite a bit. -- As I was ranking I bumped up your song a spot or two. I guess it's growing on me.

Paco del Stinko - Ooh, tasty guitar lines… I like the angle.

Rabid Garfunkel - Just didn't work very well for me. While I think the sound and mix is good, I just didn't get drawn into the song much at all.

Chocolate Chips - Cool twist. I like the laid back groove. The vocal line/effect felt just a bit old by the end and it's not that long of a song.

a' tous les monsieurs - I really like that B section. It makes a nice contrast to the A sections.

Squeeeeeeeak. Sure I barely made it this round.

Congrats Paco!

I am shocked to have won this round. There were so many good songs! I figured I'd get by somewhere near the bottom, but not take it. I humbly offer a thankful nod to the judges and a respectful bow to my fellow competitors. NUR EIN!!!!!!!!!!

I've finished posting the individual judge tallies.

As with last week, I made a minor counting error in the totals, so if you go back and re-check it you may notice some changes from last night's scores. The rankings were not affected, except that Manhattan Glutton was promoted from 7th place to a tie with Balance Lost for 6th place. Paco's lead actually widened a bit.

Congratulations, Paco!

This is the second of three rounds this year that have been won by former champions. And, not to intimidate anyone, but one-third of the remaining competitors are returning champions. Things look like they're about to get heated! NUR EIN!!!

I'll be posting detailed reviews of my own at some point this afternoon.

Generic wrote:This is the second of three rounds this year that have been won by former champions.

And more importantly, won by present members of BatP. Maybe this proves that the Psychotics don't need ol' Billy around anymore.

....ahhh, who am I kidding, I taught them everything they know.

Billy's Little Trip wrote: And more importantly, won by present members of BatP. Maybe this proves that the Psychotics don't need ol' Billy around anymore.

Well, I sound much nicer when you help me. I am not yet proficient at the end-y part of the production process, so I suppose this has been an excellent Psychotics showing thus far. Charlie, of course is his own, and everyone else's A-game! Congratulations, Paco! NUR EIN!

Judge reviews! I didn't notice any prevailing patterns this week. Some of you returned back to your comfort zones after some experimental songs, and some of you branched out more! Both are good strategies and they resulted in some very entertaining and interesting songs. Even the songs I ranked low, I was able to find something to appreciate in them, and I feel really bad about the few who wound up near the bottom of my list.

Anyway, here we go!

À Tous Les Monsieurs
Frank has been around this particular block a few times, so I assume he informed Erik that the Round Zero challenge doesn't apply to the rest of the competition, right? Your harmonies in the intro would seem to satisfy the challenge, but that portion of the song doesn't really have anything to do with what follows, and the harmonies in that section are an afterthought. I like your lyrical approach to the challenge - using spies honestly hadn't occurred to me. I am a little curious about whether the narrator knew she was a spy before he fell for her.

It usually bugs me, when a song tells a story, to hear lyrical repetition such as the last minute of this song. It provokes a knee-jerk "But I already heard that part" reaction in me, and it makes the song feel a little too long. Nonetheless, that sax solo is awesome, and I've had the melody stuck in my head since Monday morning.

Adam Adamant
I don't mind that you accidentally wrote to the wrong title. "Stolen Diary" works as a title for this even though the title doesn't appear in the lyrics. What I do mind is that you clipped the microphone recording your vocals and mixed them so loudly that the song is actually painful to listen to. The harmonies are okay I guess… You're technically hitting the notes, but your vocal tone is unpleasant. The slide ukulele is a cool effect, and there's a decent song hiding under this terrible mix, but unfortunately it wasn't enough to save you.

Balance Lost
The page-turning effect is kind of cute, but it also begs the question of why you can remember the day on the beach, and that the person was eating something, but had to look up that it was ice cream, or that the person was looking at something, but you had to look up that it was rocks. Seems kind of nitpicky, but it killed the central gimmick of the song for me on relistens. I like the message about how we all post our "diaries" online now. Your arrangement is well-executed, if a little slight.

Carlo Bruno Jr.
You pull off the slow-jam vibe really well; I wonder if there's any genre you can't imitate. I like the line "You know the naked truth," but the language throughout the rest of the song is a little difficult to interpret. I like the "Shame on you / shame on me" refrain, but I don't know why "shame on me." Shame on you for keeping the diary in the first place, I guess? It's fun to listen to, as long as I keep myself from thinking too hard about it.

Cavedwellers
I like the lyrics, like the harmonies, I like the twist at the end. It's a little straightforward for a Cavedwellers song, but that's not a dealbreaker for me. I love the Charlie Brown-esque "conversation" he has with the synthesizers that represent the parents. As a newly-minted stepfather (and soon to be real father), the theme of parental oversight (and sometimes overreach) is one that's been on my mind a lot lately. I still remember what it was like to not have access to what felt like basic human rights such as privacy and intimacy, and this song evokes that feeling pretty well. The lyrics scan well and have some clever rhymes, but you threw in some awkward phrases to make them fit. The fakeness of the drums (especially the tambourine) was distracting on multiple re-listens. But overall I enjoyed this a lot.

DJ Ranger Den
Not bad! I like the message, and you've done well with giving your songs more accessible structures lately. It's a little too didactic and blunt, but you warned us about that, and you're immune anyway.

DuToVa
Wow, acoustic suits you really well. This sounds like an Of Monsters and Men demo. I like the interplay of the voices, the minimal percussion (though that kick drum tone gets a little monotonous on repeated listens), and the two acoustic guitars. Some of the lyrics are a little awkward, and the female voice is a little shaky at points. It's mostly performed well. If the second singer had been more solid, this might have won.

Frankie Big Face
Would it be mean to point out that this is much funnier than any Boffo Yux Dudes song? From the opening bars, the melody and your delivery of it are just pure cheekiness, and it's a blast. I especially like the line "I offer her a bonjour and a smile." The harmonies are amazing, and I really appreciate your lyrical approach to the title. I had you at #2 in my ranking.

Inflatable Vegetables
I think the biggest factor in this song's low ranking is the fact that your mix is really cluttered.
I like the illustrative effect of the background vocals - it's a creative take on the challenge, for sure. Lyrically, I feel like the choruses belong to a different song from the verses. The fadeout at the end is abrupt. I like the bassline in the intro and outro. Sorry if this review is kind of a hodgepodge, but I feel like the song is, too. Some more judicious arrangement choices and/or a better mix might have improved the ranking.

Ken Mahru
In the first two rounds, I thought your voice sounded like you were fighting something, or just not that into it. That's fixed this time around. You've got that oomph and punchiness back, and the song has a lot of energy to compliment it. The lyrics are sneaky - it sounds like a peppy little love song, but the words actually really creepy. I like that juxtaposition. Musically this is a straight shot down the middle, and it's the kind of thing you excel at. No exception here.

Manhattan Glutton
I love the harmonies, but I find the lyrics a bit challenging. I'm not sure where the characters are in relation to each other. So I guess you're singing a song in private, and you want the person you're singing to, to not listen, but you're singing a song about how you don't want them to listen and sharing that song with all of us, so is this is the song you don't want the other person to hear, or…? It's kind of meta like "You're So Vain," but a little more confusing, I guess. The performance and mix are both top-tier, but that goes without saying for a Manhattan Glutton song. I like the "Da da da da da da da diary" bit.

Michael J. Samuels
Oh, so there is more to this guy! Nice! Nothing about the challenge or the way we explained it suggested that vocoders were cheating, so I don't really take issue with the fact that you chose this approach to the vocal harmonies... However, I do regret that you've stumbled upon one of my musical pet-peeves, and your lyrics are difficult to understand, too! It's a shame, because I hate penalizing people for branching out and being adventurous, but this just isn't any fun to listen to. And, man does it run long. I do appreciate how every once in a while, the unaffected voice peeks through the layers of vocoder.

Nick M. Soma
This title seems to have brought out the humorous side in a lot of the competitors. This high-energy power-pop style is the version of Nick Soma I like best, and here you really deliver. I love the Beach Boys style harmonies in the background, and all the humorously well-observed details in the lyrics. Plus that stinger, "She never ever mentions me." The only thing holding this back is that when you get near the top of your vocal range, some of your notes (particularly the last sung note in the song) sound a wee bit flat to my ear, and that hurts subsequent listens. You might have done better tuning the whole song down a half-step.

Paco del Stinko
I like the concision of the lyrics. Reminds me of "Lawyers, Guns, and Money." Even more so when you introduce a character named Carmelita. The mafioso lyrics combined with Paco's quirky take on surf rock make for interesting listening, definitely. This grew on me with repeated listens to. The building harmonies on "FBI" and "CIA" are hugely entertaining. My #1 for the week! Way to go, Paco!

Rabid Garfunkel
Even more concise lyrics than Paco's song! To the point where it might be a detriment to the song. I like the lyrics you have, but I could use more than 3-4 lines of story to keep things interesting. Hard to argue with references to "The Monkey's Paw," though. Unfortunately, this wasn't a great challenge for you. Did you sample the female voice in the background from somewhere? Sounds really familiar to me.

Chocolate Chips
And, in contrast, here's a band that this was a good challenge for. I'm not wild about the vocoder voice (I know you're all tired of hearing me say that), but it does enhance the melody and harmony lines, and their interplay. I tried not to let the fact that there are no repeating sections get in the way of my review, but when I'm trying to digest 16 songs in 48 hours, it helps when I can remember the chorus. I think what bugs me about this more than the experimental structure is the fact that the point of view shifts without warning. The first two sections are straight-up passages from the diary (what we English majors would call an "epistolary" format), and the third section shifts to the aftermath of the person reading the diary. So maybe if there was a change in voice? Or if the structure of the diary sections had been repeating, then we shift to a completely different song structure for the "then he says" part? I'm not sure. You get an A for effort, though.

Generic wrote:It's kind of meta like "You're So Vain," but a little more confusing, I guess.

And you think it's not confusing to me? This is the highest compliment you could have given about my lyrics - that you are as confused as I am. I have conveyed my emotions perfectly!

Generic wrote:Did you sample the female voice in the background from somewhere? Sounds really familiar to me.

The "fa"s are one of the female choir phonemes out of Miroslav, and the "na na na na naaa na/yeah yeah" is from one of Logic's sound bank things, so yeah, I'm sure you have. Somewhere, heh.

Jon Eric - I've got a guest vocalist as my guest for Round 3 ... so you'll get a break from my usual heavily effected vocal thing ! I guess I should put this in the Round 3 thread.

Generic wrote:
À Tous Les Monsieurs
Frank has been around this particular block a few times, so I assume he informed Erik that the Round Zero challenge doesn't apply to the rest of the competition, right? Your harmonies in the intro would seem to satisfy the challenge, but that portion of the song doesn't really have anything to do with what follows, and the harmonies in that section are an afterthought. I like your lyrical approach to the challenge - using spies honestly hadn't occurred to me. I am a little curious about whether the narrator knew she was a spy before he fell for her.

It usually bugs me, when a song tells a story, to hear lyrical repetition such as the last minute of this song. It provokes a knee-jerk "But I already heard that part" reaction in me, and it makes the song feel a little too long. Nonetheless, that sax solo is awesome, and I've had the melody stuck in my head since Monday morning.

Jon, thanks again for the listen and taking part in the judging for this contest. I don't know if it is good or bad form to reply to the reviews from judges? But I will.

Those harmonies in the intro are functionally identical to the A section, with extensions added. I was going for the form of the 40s ballads that open with a string section or a cappella choir as a rubato, free intro. By the time we end on that lush dominant 7#5#9 chord the intro is set to resolve into the main key of d minor.

But yes, singing the band name is silly and out of context. But that won't stop anytime soon. I'm committed.

Repeating the Bridge and A3 lyric is standard tin pan alley technique. Barring a few standards ("These Foolish Things"), I couldn't see it happening any other way for a 32 bar ballad. It is a tried and true tradition in songwriting in the first half of the twentieth century. For me, something about revisiting the bridge lyrics and final A section gives the story more weight. It functions in the same fashion to the modern "chorus" in top 40 music post 1950. The power of repetition.

Generic wrote: À Tous Les Monsieurs
Frank has been around this particular block a few times, so I assume he informed Erik that the Round Zero challenge doesn't apply to the rest of the competition, right? Your harmonies in the intro would seem to satisfy the challenge, but that portion of the song doesn't really have anything to do with what follows, and the harmonies in that section are an afterthought. I like your lyrical approach to the challenge - using spies honestly hadn't occurred to me. I am a little curious about whether the narrator knew she was a spy before he fell for her.

EDIT: I've decided to remove my rant about this review. But you can just imagine how outrageous it was. I saved it...just in case.