Don't Tug on Superman's Cape (A Friendly Reminder reviews)

Discuss upcoming, current, and previous song fights.
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Paco Del Stinko
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Post by Paco Del Stinko »

Add - I like this a lot. Uncomplicated but nice melodies and lyrics that make me wonder who you're addressing as it feels like it's directed towards someone specific. Instrumental section is groovy and I love the ending. Very nice recording and good trills as well.

Bang Operator - I like the middle of the night groove on the start and totally dig the slightly warbly vibe to this. often dissonant, this is where it works well for the most part. The biggest problem with this is that it doesn't go on long enough. I like a song that makes a statement in 2:00 or less, or more, whatever - but this falls off after getting you nice and warm. Still, it's a whole and feels real. Very nice.

Big Seed DNA - I like the percussion but agree with the drop or change it on the big chorus sentiment. Nice and poppy and bordering on lovey-dovey, the chorus has a nice happy/sad feel that is quite effective. I like the voices and instrumentation, the singer sounds a little like Charlie Fahren. This would work well on one of those television shows with young pretty people that I don't watch.

Blues Manufacturing Facility - I'd like to hear the dementia here presented a little less fucking-offingly.

Cake for Breakfast - This song is a mess, performance wise, but I like the simple layering ideas and arrangement. Good ambiant sounding recording and free for all attitude, but take two might've been better. And a vocal line or two could be a plus.

Depski - This is very nice urban love music. But I might've called it "Waiting On You, Lover" or something else that implies a sexy Scotch advertisement. How about Barry White promising to remind someone of the good lovin', or whatever, vocally? Nice interlude in the fight, I guess.

Flvxxvm Florvm - The vocals stutter rhythmically but I like them overall. The chunga rhythm works excellent with the psycho swamp attack on top. Don't like the abrubt ending but do like the computer stutter thingy. Great guitarage and dig the organ assault too.

Lopez and the Destroyers - The lyrics are a bit cheap, and that's coming from the cheap master, moi. Still, if the music didn't sound so hesitantly performed it would work a lot better regardless of how deep or not the lyrics go. I like the power-cheese progression for the brief time that the song is on, but this would need to soar later on in order to survive.

Lord of Oats - I like this feel a lot. Nice and moody, but not dragging its feet. This could almost be a dark sing-alonger. Nice bridge section and instrumentation. I would suggest re-doing the lead vocal nice and tight, add a second voice for harmonies where needed. Well balanced arrangement though.

MC Eric B - I like the "tried to laugh" parts better than the main verses because it's a little weirder, I suppose. A bit incomplete feeling, but then again, it would probably need an exciting change to make it bigger and more complete. I'd like to hear you rattle off twice as many lines in the same amount of time! That'd be fun!

Melvin - I like the bass and drum into guitar start and the bass line in general. This one builds fine but starts going round and round more than higher and higher. I like the bridge section very much, and it's here that it takes off best. Nice chords and vocals going on all over the place there too. As a whole not your best, as you've stated, but that bridge has some great flowering (vs. flowery) moments.

MSP - I observed the whole yacht rock thing from the side, but this totally fits in there. Sounds like FBF in a lobotomized Steely Dan combo. The chorus is so easy and effortless sounding though, it sounds like it's been on the radio forever already. I like the darker melodies leading into the chorus. Very nice work, well balanced and professionally played and arranged. Very good song.

Muppet Qu33f - I like the turbo charged Blade Runner meets Terminator feel of this but thought most of the vocal stuff fell a little flat. Sounds like a scratch pad tossed out quickly.

Paco del Stinko - This came together late in the week and is a little under-cooked, maybe. Sounds like half of all my SF! entries smooshed into one.

Ross Durand - If we ever meet at an SF! event and jam, this is the monster we'll have to do. Zappa comparisons are deserved, but it's not in a rip-off way at all. The breakdowns are what help keep it rocking. These changes shouldn't work but they kick ass, and the smokin' key solo is perfect and a better choice than guitar. Maybe lacking hooky melody, this is all you need. Well, maybe some "oo-oo" chicks in the background. A fave rocker of yours, right on! (bonus for skanky, double for tagging it to dive)

RWB - This one's looking for something and almost finds it. A little self conscious feeling, but I want to like its folky attitude. Almost.

Senza Valore - I like the melody but maybe more if it were almost slurry or pulled out. Wonderful soundscapes and layers. I like the percussion that wants to take off from itself, and doesn't, it's almost too aggressive at times. I like the mood to this one very much - dark but not too brooding.

sonofsuperDio - Sounds like the same Blue box on the guitar that I used. That chord is great and I understand how you couldn't put it down. This works well and makes you crave the band which never arrives. I like most of the vocal delivery and the wet effects on it as well. I like this a lot but can't shake the craving for face punching drums and ball crushing bass. Still, this tickles me under the base of my skull, white light.

Steve Durand - I think this is near perfect. You could listen to this or perform it in almost any setting and have it work. There's something for everyone in a timeless package. Nice and organic feeling and sounds like it's all together instead of put together, if that makes sense. One of the best this week, easily.

veGetar Ianra Ge - I hear the comparisons, but what a fun progression. Love the organ and the "ah-ah-ah" vocals. Good dance song disguised as a rocker, the all gonna die stuff is fun too. Good fun and good job.

Voh - This rolls along nicely. Good feel and tempo. The half step chorus is not as good as the verses are and too much at the end. It makes a nice contrast, mood-wise, but feels a little typical, I guess. Works well with the "dog on a leash", but the repetitions work against it. Vocal syncopation is good, how about a higher harmony?

Wages of Oats - I don't want to like the progression here, but do very much. The melody is loose but good, and the arrangement is well balanced. Performance and mix-wise, this could sparkle more, but a good rock song nevertheless.

The Weakest Suit - The one note melody straddles the line between hooking you in and annoying you to the point of screaming, with hooking just winning. The background vocals are draped perfectly behind everything and add the soul when they come in. I like the arrangement and simple instrumentation - it's all you need here.

The White Hat - I hear what you said about the vocals, but still: fine melody and lyrics. Nice and earthy, this still flows like a river. The guitar work is terrific and sounds great too. I love the serious but not dragging you down weightiness feel of this, there's still optimism in the feel. Level headed and confident. Sounds like the front porch but not all creaky and near a junk yard.
Bringin' the stink since 2006.
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milothefultz
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From Lopez + TD

Post by milothefultz »

MC Eric B

Lopez and the Destroyers - I love the music part, especially up to where you start singing. I hate the singing though. Maybe if you could mix it better that would help, like using compression so the vocals fit better with the music. My songs have this same problem usually, so it is hard for me to give advice on this.

MSP

Lopez - The strong part was the chord progression at the end. Had a cool Todd Rundgren feel to it. I would like to hear it with vocals there. The intro seemed long & the voice could use some polish.

melvin

Lopez and the Destroyers: Those must be Hammerhead drums. I should know – I used them for years. Boy, do I ever hate that sound now. But that’s not your fault. Vocals are way too loud in the mix, but the Hammerhead, the chugging guitars, the clean strumming and even the keys remind me of early Melvin, so you’re kind of freaking me out. Do I know you? Keep at it and some day you’ll be able to tell your grandkids that you once had the third-highest number of entries in an online songwriting contest.

jackfrost

Lopez and the Destroyers – I like the off key singing here. It reminds me of friends I had when I started college who would make music of this quality in their dorm rooms. I also like the song (especially after the last 4). Again, is your song supposed to cut out like that?

Paco Del Stinko

Lopez and the Destroyers - The lyrics are a bit cheap, and that's coming from the cheap master, moi. Still, if the music didn't sound so hesitantly performed it would work a lot better regardless of how deep or not the lyrics go. I like the power-cheese progression for the brief time that the song is on, but this would need to soar later on in order to survive.
Thanks to all who listened to our first attempt at a Songfight! I'm excited to be part of it!

MC Eric B - Compression would do the trick? I was wondering how to fix that problem. They sounded really fluffy and too big, but I didn't know how to fix it without them falling out of the mix. Maybe some EQ mid-scooping as well? No? Yes?

MSP - Thanks, The cheez-sound was kind of what we were going for. Over glorified bad 80's pop. Anyway, what kind of vocals at the end? Because that does sound interesting. Kind of like an extension of the song's verse or summat, idk.

melvin - Yeah, recording drums is too much of a pain in the ass, esp. with a terrible computer mic, so Hammerhead is a lot better of an alternative. So the vocals were too loud as well. Well, crap. Oh well...and I guess sounding like you is a good thing? Just kidding....

jackfrost - Thanks! We actually did record everything through a computer mic that is now gone after being sucked up by my friends vacuum. Gah! But what do you mean cut out? Did it not upload right? There is lots of stereo, so if one speaker/one earbud is used, it might sound strange/stranger than it already does.

Paco Del Stinko - Yep. Cheap vox. Will fix. It was really hard to figure out what to put at the end of that song. Claps was the only thing that cam to mind.

Well, thanks again everybody for your feedback! I definitely will use this advice on our next recording.

- Milo -
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compression

Post by MC Eric B »

I had never used compression until a few months ago, and I still have only tried it a few times, so you should get some info on that from some of the other Songfighters, since they know much more about this kind of thing than I do. I don't do much with with EQ either.
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Ross
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reviews

Post by Ross »

Sorry these are late. Based mostly on one listen and I did not necessarily get all the way through each one.

Top Two
MSP – Ooh – chorus-ey guitar. Takes awhile getting going. Barely pass(the 30 second test). This sounds so much like….something.
Nice jazz chord stuff in the pre-chorus. Great kicking into the chorus. A little cheesy – but again I think it’s right in the pocket you were going for. Very commercial sounding. And well done. Might be the best thing here. Genre bias is hard oto break. Are you Frankie Big Face? Good +

Big Seed DNA – Excellent build into the chorus. I’d like more of a color change in the second verse. Nice tunesmithing – a little infectious, but not quite a sing along. Fun toy xylophone. A little Brian May, there. Very good song. Not sure about the title so much.

Runners-up
Add – fun changes in the intro – traditional, but not. Nice words again two weeks in a row – very poetic. And yet I’m not quite sure what you’re singing about. A middle ground would be nice –even so - a very strong song. Nice instrumental build. Perhaps a little long. Good +

The White Hat – nice finger picking and harp – I like this kinda stuff – the recording brings it out well, too. I feel like the vocals are smidge stiff, but it might just be the strong enunciation of the t in “what” Excellent blues. The words are ok, but not quite up to the caliber of the instruments. The harp and voice together is interesting, but it doesn’t allow for the illusion that you’re playing it all at once. Good.

Melvin – good first line – stuff like this always makes me wish I had a cool voice. Sounds good, of course. The words are ok, kinda schticky – but well done for that. Are you Married? You don’t sound married? Good.

Flvxxvm Florvm – I like the sound – the lyrics are a little harsh – what’s the friendly part? Great key stuff Very strong entry at accomplishing what it set out. Sounds a little like a possessed Eric B. On vocals. Did this cut off early, too? Good +

Steve - very nice little sort of novelty song. Very tidy – harmonies work good. I like songs that use one chorus in many contexts and yours sort of does that. Best one so far. Good +

Paco – cool bass sound. The song takes a while to move - a little wander-ey sounding. Tidy but not grabbing me too much – the brick thing is nice. Good.

Decent listens
Lopez and the destroyers – 80s guitar – speaks to nostalgia for me. Pass
Some nice word work even with some age-old rhymes – do you like the Fantastiks? Structural much to short – oh, it cuts off, hmm

Senza Valore – nice texture. Great break for the chorus – nice take on the title. Gets a little long for me, but another one that I feel is accomplishing its goal. Good. Nice sound variety. Did not finish

Voh – I like the jangle sounds and stuff. Pass
Interesting – the words are not quite my thing. Feel a little clumsy to me, but I expect they are what you are going for. Sort of a slacker approach. Pretty good song – the theme doesn’t really get me. Too long for me since I don’t really care for the subject matter. But I can imagine liking other stuff by you. Did not quite finish.

Potential

Clubs – your vox aren’t selling this. The word play is nice – I’m a fan of internal rhyme. Tune wise it needs more variety, even a different chord under the repeating tune loops could help. So I got a bit bored. Backing vox nice. Did not finish – also did not get to where I get the title.

Vegan – Oh, I see what everyone’s saying – yeah – sounds like rip-off. You’re going for Zombies and get Bangles – bummer. The instrumental comes too early in the song structure and is too long. I don’t get the words. OK

Lord of Oats – It would be nice if things lined up better here. Do you have a bunch of latency in your system? This would feel more folky if the drums sounded more like some world beat than just doubling the guitar. Have you been listening to Thanks for the Frisbee? I like the echo on your mandolin. Tuning would be good. OK


OK
MC Eric B – A better groove for you. I get so tired of your rhyming couplets. I hate to make you pay for past stuff – haven’t you used the meat grinder line before too. Wow Eric B cussed – that was unexpected. I like the “chorus” structurally you have some nice improvements here. Getting better. But still not something I think is especially strong. You need a female vocalist on these choruses. Too short structurally A-B- A –B just doesn’t; cut it it’s because of the golden section or something, but even A-B-A-B-B is better. OK

Wages of Oats – ahh wages, king of collabs. Guitar reminds me of Spin doctors. Not doing much for me. Still reaching for some notes. Kinda of static in the instrumentation. Ok.

Muppet Queef – THX 11-38 – In the not-a-song file for me so far. Did not get all the way through – but I like your take on the title and some of your texture

Not ok
Depski – horn much to quiet on intro. Pass
Intro too long – getting impatient – uh oh, and instrumental, with no tune? Next title everyone should write words and vocals over this as a backing track – sidefight. Did not finish.

Did not pass the 30 second litmus test
Cake for Breakfast – long intro losing me before words even come in. No Pass

sonofsuperdio – Tune yer guitar. Terrible no Pass

Bang Operator – no pass

RWB – hard to listen so far no pass

BMC – no pass
"I don't like this song, but at least it's good." - veGetar Ianra Ge
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Re: From Lopez + TD

Post by MSP »

If that was your first tune you submitted...then BRAVO! I'm new to all of this Songfight concept as well, so I don't know who is new or the "seasoned veterans" :) When I said the end chord progression I was talking about the part where the synth comes in with the tight voicings. You could follow those middle notes in the voicing to make a catchy melody pretty easily.
milothefultz wrote:
MC Eric B

Lopez and the Destroyers - I love the music part, especially up to where you start singing. I hate the singing though. Maybe if you could mix it better that would help, like using compression so the vocals fit better with the music. My songs have this same problem usually, so it is hard for me to give advice on this.

MSP

Lopez - The strong part was the chord progression at the end. Had a cool Todd Rundgren feel to it. I would like to hear it with vocals there. The intro seemed long & the voice could use some polish.

melvin

Lopez and the Destroyers: Those must be Hammerhead drums. I should know – I used them for years. Boy, do I ever hate that sound now. But that’s not your fault. Vocals are way too loud in the mix, but the Hammerhead, the chugging guitars, the clean strumming and even the keys remind me of early Melvin, so you’re kind of freaking me out. Do I know you? Keep at it and some day you’ll be able to tell your grandkids that you once had the third-highest number of entries in an online songwriting contest.

jackfrost

Lopez and the Destroyers – I like the off key singing here. It reminds me of friends I had when I started college who would make music of this quality in their dorm rooms. I also like the song (especially after the last 4). Again, is your song supposed to cut out like that?

Paco Del Stinko

Lopez and the Destroyers - The lyrics are a bit cheap, and that's coming from the cheap master, moi. Still, if the music didn't sound so hesitantly performed it would work a lot better regardless of how deep or not the lyrics go. I like the power-cheese progression for the brief time that the song is on, but this would need to soar later on in order to survive.
Thanks to all who listened to our first attempt at a Songfight! I'm excited to be part of it!

MC Eric B - Compression would do the trick? I was wondering how to fix that problem. They sounded really fluffy and too big, but I didn't know how to fix it without them falling out of the mix. Maybe some EQ mid-scooping as well? No? Yes?

MSP - Thanks, The cheez-sound was kind of what we were going for. Over glorified bad 80's pop. Anyway, what kind of vocals at the end? Because that does sound interesting. Kind of like an extension of the song's verse or summat, idk.

melvin - Yeah, recording drums is too much of a pain in the ass, esp. with a terrible computer mic, so Hammerhead is a lot better of an alternative. So the vocals were too loud as well. Well, crap. Oh well...and I guess sounding like you is a good thing? Just kidding....

jackfrost - Thanks! We actually did record everything through a computer mic that is now gone after being sucked up by my friends vacuum. Gah! But what do you mean cut out? Did it not upload right? There is lots of stereo, so if one speaker/one earbud is used, it might sound strange/stranger than it already does.

Paco Del Stinko - Yep. Cheap vox. Will fix. It was really hard to figure out what to put at the end of that song. Claps was the only thing that cam to mind.

Well, thanks again everybody for your feedback! I definitely will use this advice on our next recording.

- Milo -
"ummm, yeah....let's take it up an octave & leave it out"
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Ross
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Post by Ross »

Paco Del Stinko wrote: Ross Durand - If we ever meet at an SF! event and jam, this is the monster we'll have to do. Zappa comparisons are deserved, but it's not in a rip-off way at all. The breakdowns are what help keep it rocking. These changes shouldn't work but they kick ass, and the smokin' key solo is perfect and a better choice than guitar. Maybe lacking hooky melody, this is all you need. Well, maybe some "oo-oo" chicks in the background. A fave rocker of yours, right on! (bonus for skanky, double for tagging it to dive)
I'm totally in for the jam and glad you like the song. I'm always a little nervous submitting a rocker around here with so many good rockers (such as yourself) out there.

Glad for the skanky points - it just felt right :-)

(Ps- Zappa - I feel cool!)
"I don't like this song, but at least it's good." - veGetar Ianra Ge
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Post by veGetar Ianra Ge »

Alright so I finished this week's slog for school and had some time to listen to everyone's stuff. I work as a night security watch and have plenty of dead time so I wrote a lot.


ATTN SONGFIGHTERS: One of you guys with real drums should have recorded for Ross! His song really needs them and it's better than yours anyway.


Add - Everyone seems to love you but me. It's easy to like you because the production values are so high but I don't feel like the song is catchy enough. This is the kind of song that stays on the radio for 20 years without anyone openly liking it; they just don't turn it off.

Bang Operator - Bored. Bored bored bored. Bored bored bored... out of tune guitar? bored bored. This has no energy. Maybe it's ostinato guitar that repeats for the entire song. Maybe it's the detuned drone on a non-chordal pitch. Who knows. I would be alright if I never heard this again. Learn how to end your songs, you can't just stop playing.

Big Seed DNA - Woah, man. Where did you come from? You really nailed the alt-pop idea here. It's not my thing but it's certainly good. I feel like the vocal track is popping out of the mix a little in the verse, but the level is great for the chorus. This is another radio-ready filler song. Which is a compliment, there are a million people who can't make a song worth airtime, myself included. I wish I could vote more than once per fight, you deserve one for this. My only gripe is that it feels like the chords in the want to develop more and you force them to resolve. The last chorus is really where I hear it, like you should have some repitition of lyrics while you build more tension. It's your last statement, drive it in.

Blues Manufacture Facility - The funniest part of this shit is that your name in the tag shows up as boxes and unprintable characters. How fitting. You can't just play whole tones and say "blues blues blues lose lose blues" It's interesting that you're talking about a place where they manufacture blues because this has a light industrial feel to it. "Crap nuggets" is a great line.

Bushido Stylus - The first two notes are from another song, right down to the reverb/delay piano. I can't remember what it's called. Help me out everyone... it's a whole measure of piano playing the root and then a measure of it playing the fifth, both of which have delay to make them sound like eighth notes. Back to your song. It's boring but anything would have been better than last week. Eric B does a much better nerdcore job than you. Listen to his stuff and give it another shot. Yours has no energy and, most importantly, no flow. You gotta be right on the beat if you're going to try to rap like this. It sounds like you just don't feel it, it's hard to cure. Protip: Talking about The Legend of Zelda won't automatically make your song successful.

Cake for Breakfast - Jesus. Stop it. This is terrible. It sounds like you recorded this with iPod headphones and a Guitar Research chorus pedal. It's pretty long for not having a melody. Music doesn't always work as freeverse. Gotta have some structure.

depski - This is groovy but it needs a melody. Get some nice RnB sax over top of this and you'll have a smooth jazz winner. As it is, this is not a complete idea.

Flvxxvm Florvm - I don't want to like this song but I kind of do. It's a pretty jammin' beat and the nasty imp vocals really help the mood. I'm not quite sure about the blip noises around 1:15 but that might be related to whatever issue is cutting yoursong off at 1:19. I wish I could hear the rest.

Lopez - This is a nice melody. The nerd drum sequence works well too. I'm glad you went with keys to establish a chord back ground instead of guitar, it really works for this song. The vocals, as with most of us, are not up to par. It's one thing to make a nerdy sounding song, but it's quite another to smother it with inexperience/poorly engineer vox. Still, there's nothing wrong with the song itself.

The LOO - This is way above par for you I think. Having heard a lot, if not all, of your music. That being said, doubling the vocals can't hide the fact that they are wobblier than a sorority girl on friday night. If you do want to stick with the doubled vox idea, I'd put some work into getting them to line up. It's a little painful to hear notes starting and ending all over the place. The first and last lines of this song is probably the best parts. I found myself singing "I wrote to you... you wrote me back," all week long and the release on the major tonic really helps out the lyrics. I think you're closer to what KA was talking about in the HOMBH reviews. The delivery here helps the feel of the song. You're not just blibbering some poetry with music in the background.

MC Eric B - I thought you were a bust as an artist, but this song has saved you for me. Your voice is so ""nyaaah nyaah!" It really couldn't work more for this. The lyrics are a little too uplifting for the heavy beat you've got going here. The song makes me want to strut around and give people dirty looks, but then you tell me I have to think positive. Fuck no. I want to strut and give everyone the finger. I think if your lyrics grew a pair then this would be a vote contender. It's catchy.

Melvin - Everyone keeps referring to this as an "off-week" for you but honestly, if I had made this song I'd be showing everyone that I've ever met. I don't know how you stay so fresh. This isn't quite as good as last week but it's still way out in front of the pack. I love the slow/breakdown falsetto girlfriend impression. It really leads into the uptempo section. You're already breaking out with your movie gig and I'd expect bigger things to come. Don't forget about SONGFIGHT! when you make it to the big leagues. Great job.

MSP - Let's hear it for chord extensions! I'm glad to hear people exploring more than 1st position open-string triads. This could be my favorite song in this week. People are knocking you for not being exploratory, but I don't think they're listening. There is a lot going on here. It could use some more effective percussion in the verse. This chorus is really well executed. I particularly like the color change at "all I want to say to her." I'm keeping this for sure. Awesome job!

Muppet Queef - As much as I love the imagery of your band name. This song really is really lacking. It sounds like you're trying to pull a King Crimson/nerdcore thing but you aren't a virtuoso so it isn't work. Emulating bands isn't necessarily a bad idea, but realize that whatever you make isn't going to be as good as I'm wanting to hear. That being said, this could probably get some play time on a middle-of-the-night public radio show about music that no one's heard of. At least it's something.

Paco del Stinko - I don't like this as much as your last one, especially in the vocals. There are some shining parts but the slightly off tune parts really grind my gears. I don't know if you were trying to sound a little off to increase the tension but it certainly worked if you did. I was anxious for something to happen the whole time. Your bass tone rocks my asshole. I have to sequence bass for my songs because I don't own one yet, not that I have room in my dorm for an array of guitars anyway, but your songs always remind me that you just can't substitute for real performance. If that's not a real bass then please tell what the hell you do to generate that tone.

Ross - Yeah, dude. I'm really digging this now. I absolutely hated it at first, but it's sinking in and I'm starting to appreciate the sound a lot more. The worst part is the drumming, but you saw that coming; someone really should have helped you out there. That being said, it's tough to find something to complain about here. The vocals kick ass and the guitar really sits well with them. I wish you had found a way to make the riff feel bigger. I want to jump around and head butt shit at 70bpm but it's just not heavy enough. The tone is good but it's missing something. Presence or something. I NEED IT! It's already been said, but props on using "Skanky dive." It's so fitting.

RWB - This is too low budget for you to use the satanic reverse vocal. The vocals are so unconvincing. "Woa oo oo" Is what you say when you just gotta get your emotions out, you can't just slurr it on the floor when you don't want to make real lyrics. Spend more time on the next one, there is potential here.

Senza Valore - I don't like the beat for this. Not that it's the wrong feel, it's just too clicky. This is a great song regardless and very well done. Some of you jerks are really getting a pro-sound and I wish I could get there. You and Melvin and Puce (oldschool) need to get together and have a seminar on how to record/mix/master a track. Good work here.

sonsofsuperDio - This is no good. The vocals are out of control and that minor third sitting on top of the guitar track is KILLING ME. If you were trying to make a surreal blues track that doesn't excel in any particular area then you are on the money.

Steve - This is some fantastic songwriting! I don't know if you've seen the movie "A Mighty Wind" but you could be a writer for that kind of stuff. I'm always amazed by people with this kind of vision. The chorus is so well delivered! You really nailed this style right on. All the way down to the randomly inserted spoken phrase and old-tyme vocab ("the lurch" hell yes!) I can appreciate the irony in using conservative white folk music to express your anti-jesus sentiments. I wish we all could write songs with the skill that you've shown here. I'll probably vote for you just based on that.

veGetar - Alright, so it sounds like the Bangles. I like the Bangles and I'm ok with that. I really wish I had had the time to pull this song together a little more. I can totally relate to the previous comment about the organ solo killing the energy because of its length. I really wanted half of that solo to be another verse but I couldn't squeek it out in time. That being said, I think I did alright for a highschool rock/dance tune.

Voh - Nice voice, man. The song is boring but it sounds like you'll be making some good stuff in the future. I'd like to hear this filled out with some more instrumentation, but only because you doubled the vocals in parts. If you're going to go "unplugged" it should be consistent or it just sounds a little underfed. This is the kind of song that everyone always heard Creed belting out on the alt-rock station. I hate Creed. This isn't a bad song, it's just not good. The end really loses me. Cut your losses and Stop this at 3 min.

The Weakest Suit - This is a pretty big improvement. You're having subtle intonation problems, which is probably worse than having large ones. When I feel like I can't lock in my pitches, I head over to the piano. Play the melody slowly and make sure you're able to hit notes right on without having to scoop or dive into the pitch. That swooping approach doesn't hold up when you don't have the reference pitch in your ear. This is a good relaxed tune but I don't feel like it developed enough. Not to say that it needed to be louder or harder anywhere, it was just too plateau for me really get into.

The White Hat - This is fucking badass. Teach me to play guitar. You're like a scary old man from the days of John Henry. This has "Black Snake Moan" written all over it (good movie if you have the time). The notion that God is tallying up our good and bad deeds to pass a judgement on us is the kind of scary shit that these kinds of songs always seem to harbor. I love it.

Woo - Wages, I'm going to be honest with you. I don't like your voice. It's got good range and timbre but it's so out of control and out of tune that I just have trouble listening to it. You need some lessons or something to rope that thing in. Lord, good work with this backing track. I really dig the solo, but I feel like your phrase wasn't finished when it ended. The mini solo at the end felt a little out of the loop.
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Paco Del Stinko
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Post by Paco Del Stinko »

Ah, don't be nervous Ross, you rock!

Vegitarian - I sure wasn't singing off on purpose. I just suck. :) It's funny about the bass, which is real, but a couple of times I thought "Hmm - that almost sounds like Seinfeld theme bass." Maybe you can find a $50 short scale bass at a flea market or something, although your programming seems to be fine. Good write-ups, too.
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melvin
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Re: reviews

Post by melvin »

rdurand wrote:Are you Married? You don’t sound married?
Haha, yes, I'm married. I don't sound married? That may be because I turn into a completely different person as soon I enter the Basement of Rock. Thanks for the review, Ross!
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Post by The Weakest Suit »

veGetar Ianra Ge wrote: The Weakest Suit - This is a pretty big improvement. You're having subtle intonation problems, which is probably worse than having large ones. When I feel like I can't lock in my pitches, I head over to the piano. Play the melody slowly and make sure you're able to hit notes right on without having to scoop or dive into the pitch. That swooping approach doesn't hold up when you don't have the reference pitch in your ear. This is a good relaxed tune but I don't feel like it developed enough. Not to say that it needed to be louder or harder anywhere, it was just too plateau for me really get into.
you're right on all counts. i could not come up with anything all week. i tried again on thursday about an hour before the "it's always sunny" premere and wrote this song. after the two episodes (11pm) i went up and recorded it, but i had to be quiet because my girlfriend was going to sleep. so i had to watch my singing and playing volume. the background vocals were a complete accident that happened when i was just goofing around while listening to a playback. i got done with everything and submitted the song sometime between 2 and 3 am. i kind of consider this the kind of song that would start or end a tape or something, if recorded better. personally, i was just happy i came up with something somewhat decent before the deadline.
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jeff robertson
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Post by jeff robertson »

veGetar Ianra Ge wrote: Flvxxvm Florvm - I don't want to like this song but I kind of do. It's a pretty jammin' beat and the nasty imp vocals really help the mood. I'm not quite sure about the blip noises around 1:15 but that might be related to whatever issue is cutting yoursong off at 1:19. I wish I could hear the rest.
There isn't any rest. I only recorded a finite amount of backing music, before the lyrics were really worked out, and this is where it happened to stop. The song originally ended at the same place with a sustained power chord and screamed "AAAAAAAGGGGGggGHHHHGGGH!!!". I decided I didn't like that ending, and what you hear now is the only thing I had time to come up with to replace it.
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Post by Dennis »

[quote="veGetar Ianra Ge"]
Learn how to end your songs, you can't just stop playing.


That bears repeating :roll:
veGetar Ianra Ge
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Post by veGetar Ianra Ge »

Dennis wrote:
veGetar Ianra Ge wrote: Learn how to end your songs, you can't just stop playing.


That bears repeating :roll:
Is that directed at this week's half-a-song entry? :wink:

Also, apparently my download folder had some old stuff in it so I accidentally re-reviewed a few that didn't compete this week. Get over it.

Edit: Hey cool. Your inability to use the quote feature correctly carried over to mine too.
Last edited by veGetar Ianra Ge on Tue Sep 25, 2007 2:35 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Post by veGetar Ianra Ge »

THE MODS wrote: A friendly reminder: don't forget to vote!
Yeah that includes me. I'm really sorry your opening gig was a duck, MSP. I was planning on voting for you. I just don't function well at 5 in the morning I guess.
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Post by voh »

Thanks for the comments, people! I've learned a lot through them, and definitely know what I shouldn't do (which is good, because listening to it now I agree entirely).

Next time it's all-out one-man band time. I think I'm fairly past the guy&guitar thing, but with only 2 hours before the deadline I guessed why not :)

Once more, thanks for the honest reviews!
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Post by The Weakest Suit »

i was going to get around to listening to and reviewing these in the lull, but there apparently is none, so there will be no reviews here. i didn't have the time to listen to these, but what i did hear was a lot worse than last fight.
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Ross
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Post by Ross »

The Weakest Suit wrote:i didn't have the time to listen to these, but what i did hear was a lot worse than last fight.
I think I'd prefer "not my thing."
"I don't like this song, but at least it's good." - veGetar Ianra Ge
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Post by jack »

ADD wins a crowded songfight. yes, there is justice and hope in songfightistan. good job jefff.
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Billy's Little Trip
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Post by Billy's Little Trip »

Congrats Jefff, great tune. :wink:
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Post by Lord of Oats »

So I was a little busier than usual for this week, which still isn't that busy, but I'm really awful with time management. I'll do reviews, but only if you're going to read them.

Since I won't doing all of them, and I've had the songs for quite a while now, I should be able to give fairly detailed feedback. So, if anybody wants one, respond to this, and I'll write my thoughts here, or PM me, and I'll PM you back.
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senza valore
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Post by senza valore »

Lord of Oats - Better late than never.. I'd still love to hear what you think.
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Post by jackfrost »

Lord of Oats wrote:So I was a little busier than usual for this week, which still isn't that busy, but I'm really awful with time management. I'll do reviews, but only if you're going to read them.

Since I won't doing all of them, and I've had the songs for quite a while now, I should be able to give fairly detailed feedback. So, if anybody wants one, respond to this, and I'll write my thoughts here, or PM me, and I'll PM you back.
isn't it apparent that everyone wants as many reviews as possible? that's why they are submitting songs here. making people ask you for a review is just plain stupid. everyone is busy, and life only gets busier the older you get. so either write a sentence or two about each song, or don't. or only write about the ones you liked. but adding a whole other layer of PMs and "yes, i would like one" replies in this thread seems unnecessary, and more like a cry for attention.
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