SpinTunes 20 Round 3 Challenge
One goal of SpinTunes is to push participants outside of their comfort zones and get them creating something they wouldn't have created otherwise. That goal is implicit in many of the challenges, but this round we're making it explicit. Here's your Round 3 challenge:
Self Improvement: Learn something new. Display your new knowledge or skill in your song. Tell us in your song bio about what you learned.
Some possible examples:
A new instrument
A new vocal or instrumental technique
A new compositional technique or music theory concept
New arrangement or production techniques
Lyrics in a new language
A new lyrical/poetic form
New information/subject matter for your lyrics
Submitting Entries:
Your entry must be received by Sunday, April 16, 2023 @ 11:59 PM EDT. Otherwise it'll be posted as a shadow. Received means that it has to appear in my e-mail inbox (spintunescontest@gmail.com) by the given deadline. I will be going by the time stamp on the e-mail. One minute late is too late.
You are allowed and encouraged to submit a draft of your song early just in case something horrible happens and you miss the deadline. Then you can add polish to your song and send in a better version closer to the deadline. The last version received prior to the deadline is your official entry.
Lyrics are mandatory. No instrumentals. Having no lyrics will get you disqualified.
SUBMITTING BY EMAIL: Send your file in a format that BandCamp accepts. (.wav or .flac) (at least 16-bit/44.1kHz) Do not send MP3s.
Name your file the song's title + your band name, without punctuation.
The subject line of the e-mail should identify the challenge and your band's name. Something like this would be fine: "ST20R3 - All the Robots".
Include the song lyrics in the body of the e-mail.
Include information on anyone that needs credited if you collaborated with someone.
ALTERNATE FILE SHARING OPTIONS: If your file is too big for an email attachment, you may email me a link to where I can download the song. The email still needs to land in my inbox by the deadline.
If you have a Bandcamp account you can just send me a link to your song if you include all the info I mentioned for emails. Info such as lyrics and song credits can be included in the email or on the song's Bandcamp page. Make sure you have it set as a free download, and have it set so that I don't have to put in an e-mail to download it if you pick this option.
You may also use a file sharing service such as DropBox, WeTransfer, Google Drive, etc. Include in the email any required information (such as lyrics) that you couldn't include in the file. Make sure I have permission to download the file, and please follow directions so your file doesn't wind up in my spam or trash folder accidentally.
SONG BIOS: In addition to lyrics and any necessary credits, you are welcome to include a "song bio", with any information you feel is useful. This could include your inspiration for the song, citations for any obscure references within the lyrics, an explanation of how your song met the challenge, etc. Some challenges may require you to supply certain info in your song bio. Since the judges are volunteers with lives outside of SpinTunes, song bios can help them zero in on aspects of the song you feel are important. However, if your song requires a multi-paragraph explanation in order to understand and appreciate it, this is probably a sign that it doesn't stand up well on its own, and its ranking may reflect that.
Side Notes:
You can send in an entry to SpinTunes 20 without competing. Just tell me it's a "Shadow Song". It will be played at the listening party but won't be ranked and you might not receive feedback from the judges. Check the FAQ if you don't know what that means. You can even complete past challenges from previous contests. It's a nice way of playing along if you can't commit to the schedule or you just want to get your feet wet.
The only other way to get your music played at the listening party is to cover "Today's The Day" by Inverse T. Clown or "Right Again" by Mandibles.
Spin Tunes 20 Round 3 Challenge - Self Improvement
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BoffoYux
- Panama
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Spin Tunes 20 Round 3 Challenge - Self Improvement
Last edited by BoffoYux on Wed Apr 19, 2023 12:43 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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BoffoYux
- Panama
- Posts: 926
- Joined: Tue Jan 11, 2011 9:22 pm
- Instruments: Keys, Clunking, SFX and Strings
- Recording Method: Audacity, Adobe, and other 'A' titled software
- Submitting as: Boffo Yux Dudes
- Location: New England
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Re: Spin Tunes 20 R3 - Self Improvement
ST20.3 Listening Party and Deadline News
The Round 3 deadline has passed. Congratulations to all the contestants who stretched themselves, learned something new, and shared it with us in song!
15 of the 19 eligible contestants submitted songs by the deadline, which left room for 3 shadows to be reinstated, bringing us back to 18 entries as originally planned. Welcome back to the competition, Phlub, Sober, and The Popped Hearts!
The songs of Round 3, both competing entries and shadows, will be debuted tonight at a Listening Party hosted by Tommy G. The Listening Party is currently scheduled for 9 pm; delays or updates to the scheduled time will be posted on Twitter.
Join us for the Listening Party on YouTube or watch in the embedded player below. If you're on YouTube, be sure to switch the chat option from "Top Chat" to "Live Chat" to join in on the conversation as we hear these songs for the first time!
The Round 3 deadline has passed. Congratulations to all the contestants who stretched themselves, learned something new, and shared it with us in song!
15 of the 19 eligible contestants submitted songs by the deadline, which left room for 3 shadows to be reinstated, bringing us back to 18 entries as originally planned. Welcome back to the competition, Phlub, Sober, and The Popped Hearts!
The songs of Round 3, both competing entries and shadows, will be debuted tonight at a Listening Party hosted by Tommy G. The Listening Party is currently scheduled for 9 pm; delays or updates to the scheduled time will be posted on Twitter.
Join us for the Listening Party on YouTube or watch in the embedded player below. If you're on YouTube, be sure to switch the chat option from "Top Chat" to "Live Chat" to join in on the conversation as we hear these songs for the first time!
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Michael
- A New Player
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- Submitting as: Ironbark, Possum Sauce
- Pronouns: he/him
- Location: Australia
Re: Spin Tunes 20 Round 3 Challenge - Self Improvement
Some quick thoughts on the Round 3 entries. Don't expect any great insight - I just appreciate the people who took the time to give feedback on the enormous early rounds and want to return the favour.
I'm assuming no one here is too thin-skinned, since we're all throwing our songs up on the net to be judged, so I've tried to include constructive criticism where it occurs to me. Hope it's helpful. If not, just ignore me and trust your own ears. Thanks for the music, all.
The Popped Hearts: You threw my brain for a loop to begin with - the Caribbean vibe had me thinking 'tusand takk' must be patois like Desmond Dekker's 'It Mek'. This is a charmer. The combination of steel drum and melodica with Norwegian is a daffy idea I completely support. There are some sloppy bits you could fix up. I hope you don't.
Daniel Sitler: Another strong one from you. Lovely leaps into falsetto, and there's an expressive catch in your voice (at e.g. 1:00) that makes me miss Scott Hutchison all over again. Great cathedral sound to the supporting vocals. There are things you might tweak in a redraft - more variation in the lyrics? - but there's a purity to the improvisation here you might lose. It's a shame you didn't submit this just before deadline: it feels a bit long as a mid-album track, but it's the perfect length (and mood) for a closer.
Stacking Theory: The unhurried spaciousness in the verses makes me think of David Bridie. (Hang on, you're not David Bridie, are you?) Great lyrics, they're circling around something important while leaving the listener to make the final call. I'm imagining that weightless second when someone's yoinked out the bottommost turtle but things haven't yet started to fall. Very effective moment when the chorus realises the message isn't getting through, sighs, then drifts back into the verse. The effects on the vocal don't add anything for me, but I respect your decision to put tomato sauce on your chips. (They remind me of that synthetic aftertaste you get from aggressive autotuning.)
Balance Lost: Not sure you need the doubled vocals in the first verse - combined with the shakers, the hissy chorus cymbals and the distortion on the guitar, this song already has a lot going in that frequency range. Slightly tiring on the ear. Mix nitpicking aside, this is right up my alley. Strong song with excellent bones, lovely chorus melodies, and that higher voice coming in for the second half fits perfectly - it doesn't have to compete for space. Great stuff.
The Pannacotta Army: There's a wonderful swing to those 3-bar phrases. Lots and lots of gorgeous chords. Ba-ba-bas too! Andrew Bird does the Beach Boys. Masterful stuff, beautifully constructed. It probably wouldn't hurt the lyrics to have a bit more specific detail to latch onto - they wash away a little - and that 'EAR-ase' bugs me ever so slightly, but it's a bloody lovely song. Carry on.
Jeff Walker: There's a golden warmth to your sound here. I like the hectic tumbling of words in the verse, though I did have to pull up the lyric sheet to catch them all. Without having read the McCarthy, the lyrics are slightly inscrutable but very evocative - vivid glimpses you can't quite hold onto, a surreal tumble through US history. The shift at the end of the chorus hints at something slightly amiss with these angels, but maybe that's just because I've read enough McCarthy to suspect that things probably don't end well.
Siebass: I was expecting a throwaway comedy skit from the intro, and that would've been more than fine, but the lyrics and beatboxing are really solid and fully committed. Love the timing on your lead verse vocal - a lazy drawl that stretches itself around the beat. Great contrast between the verses and chorus too - like switching from tribal chanting to (don't kill me) big stadium boy band. (Maybe I'm a crack spackler, but I kind of wish you'd done the entire guitar solo with your voice. It would have been dumb and cheesy and excellent.)
The Alleviators: Huge energy out of the gate, and you manage to keep it going throughout. Really infectious song. I like the arrangement: the mandolin adds a lot of flavour, and there's something quiet and interesting happening out there on the right. What is that: bowed guitar? Charming delivery of the title line. 'Dreaming too big and thinking too small' is great. I wonder if the mandolin should be panned closer to centre - it feels a bit isolated out there on the left.
Bubba & The Ghost of the Kraken: I'd never heard of Erzsébet Báthori, so I learned something here too. Excellent subject for a song. Inspired juxtaposition between the subject matter and the tight funk groove. The smooth way you sing 'bathing in their blood' makes me smile without fail. The rapid-fire lines work a treat. Might work even better if you could rustle up a second vocalist to trade lines with (and chime in on the Erzsébets). 'Torture vampire hickey' may be the top line of the round.
Ironbark: Wrote and recorded this in a long session on Sunday after I realised my initial idea was too ambitious. I wish I'd had longer to get comfortable with the cello - it's hard to be expressive when you're carefully watching your fingers, and it was only by the end of the day that I was building up any muscle memory at all. I still think the cello's the most beautiful instrument in the world and I hope it forgives me. (Cheers to the Discord Spintuners for last-minute tips on playing and recording.)
Cavedwellers: I realise you're trying to sneak cricket facts into your songs (obliquely, bless you), and I'm having none of it. I've spent my life in a cricket-obsessed country and played the damn sport without understanding a thing about it, and I'm not going to ruin my ignorance now. Song's great though. The shift from the message-in-a-bottle-y riff to the sunlit, slightly dissonant chorus guitars is lovely. You incorporate the doubled harmonies so subtly and naturally that I didn't really notice them until I read your song bio. The song feels like it's coming to a natural close around 2:45, then gets its second wind for another minute and a half. (Which is fine. I think reviewing 20+ songs is just making me value brevity.)
Jealous Brother: An excellent 70s Bowie vibe to this. Intriguing ironic lyrics. The instrumental break after 'so dry' is a beautiful thing. I always love a harmonium. Wouldn't change a thing here; this feels like it's exactly what it wants to be. (Except the sudden fade ending, boo.) A real grower too. I like it more every listen.
Tunes By LJ: Excellent production, smooth as a beachside cocktail. Like the Pannacotta Army, you have a knack for pulling off fresh and satisfying chord changes without making a big deal of it. You even made me enjoy that widdly synth which leads the chorus back into the verse, a sound which usually gets my back up. (What do you call that? It's like the West Coast gangsta whine's mellow cousin.) As above, wouldn't change a thing. Top work.
Phlub: As someone who still occasionally dreams of a giant pigman in a suit playing the double bass, I mean it as a sincere compliment when I say this reminds me of Primus. Slightly unhinged, but played straight enough for plausible deniability. It's a delight. Chickadee chickadee chickadee. (Mix feels overcompressed.)
Governing Dynamics: The 9/8 carries itself like a slow, sad waltz. A little cog in someone's war, still dreaming of big skies. It's different in so many ways, but there's something here that makes me think of those melancholy rousing anthems that Tom Waits likes to do. Downtrodden but big-hearted. I reckon you should bump up your vocals a little.
Temnere: This is a blast. Sailing into the wind with a knife between my teeth. Love how well that big Clash-y guitar fits into the arrangement. Mix feels like it could use more top end, and I'd bring that accordion up a bit. This would be a hell of a lot of fun to cover in the bonus round - shame I don't have the right voice for it. I was grinning all the way through.
Mandibles: Second song in a row that I could imagine being sung as a shanty. Sorry to hear about the relationship troubles, but you got a cracker of a song out of it. Hmm, that sounds more flippant than I intended. Best of luck with everything. There's a real drama to the shifts in tempo; you pack so much into three minutes. Some nice subtle details in the arrangement that took a while for me to register (e.g. that phasing sound off to the right). The severe clipping on the final chord fits the theme, but I'd be happier without it.
Sober: That stomp/clap/bass groove had me from the word go. Great technique on the vocal slides. Nice switch from bravado to vulnerability in the final chorus. Well written, professionally performed. Just a very solid song on all fronts. My partner has a habit of singing 'O Death!' in her best Ralph Stanley at random moments to make me laugh, which I only mention because I can't think of much useful criticism to offer. Maybe bring the claps down a dB or two, or just stagger them ever so slightly. You're an unnervingly precise clapper. Top stuff.
chewmeupspitmeout: This is very effective, feels like someone being flogged as they're marched up a hill. Big bruising rasps of distortion. I thought the edge of distortion on the main vocal was the right choice until the outro reminded me how lovely your natural voice is and I found myself wishing you'd left it clean throughout. Yes, yes, it'd undermine the point of the song. Counter-argument: you sing pretty. Pleased to hear you report that ChatGPT won't be winning SpinTunes until at least 2024.
Hot Pink Halo: Very harmonically open to begin with, the vocal melody carving its own path while the ukes stay hesitant and non-committal. Really catches the ear and builds expectation; my brain's guessing at the missing harmonies. Each chorus gains a little confidence, but you keep us waiting so that those final harmony vocals are like rain after a drought. Very intriguing, and fits well with the upfront but oblique lyrics. I found myself hoping for a bass instrument to come in and anchor things for a proper, solid final dance - it's all I ever wanted - but life ain't like that. (The Taskmaster clips you posted are region-blocked here, so all I have is a teaser image of Bob Mortimer and the undoubtedly bonkers song he would have sung.)
Mandrake: The synth sounds in the intro didn't grab me at first (though I can see why you chose them thematically), but things soon click into place. The microtuning and time signature give the surface-calm moments a slightly woozy, disoriented feel, and contrast well with the abrasive gameboy-in-a-microwave intrusions. The outro groove's my favourite bit. It feels like a working compromise (or truce?) between the listless and the brutal - anxiety harnessed well. Or maybe it's just a cool groove and I'm overthinking it. (P.S. I'd love to hear your voice more clearly. Do you have access to another mic? Your current one is sucking away all the top end, so the microtonality doesn't really come across in your singing.)
Phew. Glad I don't have to rank these. Do you favour end result or commitment to theme? Sucks to be a judge. My favourite's Pannacotta by a hair.
I'm assuming no one here is too thin-skinned, since we're all throwing our songs up on the net to be judged, so I've tried to include constructive criticism where it occurs to me. Hope it's helpful. If not, just ignore me and trust your own ears. Thanks for the music, all.
The Popped Hearts: You threw my brain for a loop to begin with - the Caribbean vibe had me thinking 'tusand takk' must be patois like Desmond Dekker's 'It Mek'. This is a charmer. The combination of steel drum and melodica with Norwegian is a daffy idea I completely support. There are some sloppy bits you could fix up. I hope you don't.
Daniel Sitler: Another strong one from you. Lovely leaps into falsetto, and there's an expressive catch in your voice (at e.g. 1:00) that makes me miss Scott Hutchison all over again. Great cathedral sound to the supporting vocals. There are things you might tweak in a redraft - more variation in the lyrics? - but there's a purity to the improvisation here you might lose. It's a shame you didn't submit this just before deadline: it feels a bit long as a mid-album track, but it's the perfect length (and mood) for a closer.
Stacking Theory: The unhurried spaciousness in the verses makes me think of David Bridie. (Hang on, you're not David Bridie, are you?) Great lyrics, they're circling around something important while leaving the listener to make the final call. I'm imagining that weightless second when someone's yoinked out the bottommost turtle but things haven't yet started to fall. Very effective moment when the chorus realises the message isn't getting through, sighs, then drifts back into the verse. The effects on the vocal don't add anything for me, but I respect your decision to put tomato sauce on your chips. (They remind me of that synthetic aftertaste you get from aggressive autotuning.)
Balance Lost: Not sure you need the doubled vocals in the first verse - combined with the shakers, the hissy chorus cymbals and the distortion on the guitar, this song already has a lot going in that frequency range. Slightly tiring on the ear. Mix nitpicking aside, this is right up my alley. Strong song with excellent bones, lovely chorus melodies, and that higher voice coming in for the second half fits perfectly - it doesn't have to compete for space. Great stuff.
The Pannacotta Army: There's a wonderful swing to those 3-bar phrases. Lots and lots of gorgeous chords. Ba-ba-bas too! Andrew Bird does the Beach Boys. Masterful stuff, beautifully constructed. It probably wouldn't hurt the lyrics to have a bit more specific detail to latch onto - they wash away a little - and that 'EAR-ase' bugs me ever so slightly, but it's a bloody lovely song. Carry on.
Jeff Walker: There's a golden warmth to your sound here. I like the hectic tumbling of words in the verse, though I did have to pull up the lyric sheet to catch them all. Without having read the McCarthy, the lyrics are slightly inscrutable but very evocative - vivid glimpses you can't quite hold onto, a surreal tumble through US history. The shift at the end of the chorus hints at something slightly amiss with these angels, but maybe that's just because I've read enough McCarthy to suspect that things probably don't end well.
Siebass: I was expecting a throwaway comedy skit from the intro, and that would've been more than fine, but the lyrics and beatboxing are really solid and fully committed. Love the timing on your lead verse vocal - a lazy drawl that stretches itself around the beat. Great contrast between the verses and chorus too - like switching from tribal chanting to (don't kill me) big stadium boy band. (Maybe I'm a crack spackler, but I kind of wish you'd done the entire guitar solo with your voice. It would have been dumb and cheesy and excellent.)
The Alleviators: Huge energy out of the gate, and you manage to keep it going throughout. Really infectious song. I like the arrangement: the mandolin adds a lot of flavour, and there's something quiet and interesting happening out there on the right. What is that: bowed guitar? Charming delivery of the title line. 'Dreaming too big and thinking too small' is great. I wonder if the mandolin should be panned closer to centre - it feels a bit isolated out there on the left.
Bubba & The Ghost of the Kraken: I'd never heard of Erzsébet Báthori, so I learned something here too. Excellent subject for a song. Inspired juxtaposition between the subject matter and the tight funk groove. The smooth way you sing 'bathing in their blood' makes me smile without fail. The rapid-fire lines work a treat. Might work even better if you could rustle up a second vocalist to trade lines with (and chime in on the Erzsébets). 'Torture vampire hickey' may be the top line of the round.
Ironbark: Wrote and recorded this in a long session on Sunday after I realised my initial idea was too ambitious. I wish I'd had longer to get comfortable with the cello - it's hard to be expressive when you're carefully watching your fingers, and it was only by the end of the day that I was building up any muscle memory at all. I still think the cello's the most beautiful instrument in the world and I hope it forgives me. (Cheers to the Discord Spintuners for last-minute tips on playing and recording.)
Cavedwellers: I realise you're trying to sneak cricket facts into your songs (obliquely, bless you), and I'm having none of it. I've spent my life in a cricket-obsessed country and played the damn sport without understanding a thing about it, and I'm not going to ruin my ignorance now. Song's great though. The shift from the message-in-a-bottle-y riff to the sunlit, slightly dissonant chorus guitars is lovely. You incorporate the doubled harmonies so subtly and naturally that I didn't really notice them until I read your song bio. The song feels like it's coming to a natural close around 2:45, then gets its second wind for another minute and a half. (Which is fine. I think reviewing 20+ songs is just making me value brevity.)
Jealous Brother: An excellent 70s Bowie vibe to this. Intriguing ironic lyrics. The instrumental break after 'so dry' is a beautiful thing. I always love a harmonium. Wouldn't change a thing here; this feels like it's exactly what it wants to be. (Except the sudden fade ending, boo.) A real grower too. I like it more every listen.
Tunes By LJ: Excellent production, smooth as a beachside cocktail. Like the Pannacotta Army, you have a knack for pulling off fresh and satisfying chord changes without making a big deal of it. You even made me enjoy that widdly synth which leads the chorus back into the verse, a sound which usually gets my back up. (What do you call that? It's like the West Coast gangsta whine's mellow cousin.) As above, wouldn't change a thing. Top work.
Phlub: As someone who still occasionally dreams of a giant pigman in a suit playing the double bass, I mean it as a sincere compliment when I say this reminds me of Primus. Slightly unhinged, but played straight enough for plausible deniability. It's a delight. Chickadee chickadee chickadee. (Mix feels overcompressed.)
Governing Dynamics: The 9/8 carries itself like a slow, sad waltz. A little cog in someone's war, still dreaming of big skies. It's different in so many ways, but there's something here that makes me think of those melancholy rousing anthems that Tom Waits likes to do. Downtrodden but big-hearted. I reckon you should bump up your vocals a little.
Temnere: This is a blast. Sailing into the wind with a knife between my teeth. Love how well that big Clash-y guitar fits into the arrangement. Mix feels like it could use more top end, and I'd bring that accordion up a bit. This would be a hell of a lot of fun to cover in the bonus round - shame I don't have the right voice for it. I was grinning all the way through.
Mandibles: Second song in a row that I could imagine being sung as a shanty. Sorry to hear about the relationship troubles, but you got a cracker of a song out of it. Hmm, that sounds more flippant than I intended. Best of luck with everything. There's a real drama to the shifts in tempo; you pack so much into three minutes. Some nice subtle details in the arrangement that took a while for me to register (e.g. that phasing sound off to the right). The severe clipping on the final chord fits the theme, but I'd be happier without it.
Sober: That stomp/clap/bass groove had me from the word go. Great technique on the vocal slides. Nice switch from bravado to vulnerability in the final chorus. Well written, professionally performed. Just a very solid song on all fronts. My partner has a habit of singing 'O Death!' in her best Ralph Stanley at random moments to make me laugh, which I only mention because I can't think of much useful criticism to offer. Maybe bring the claps down a dB or two, or just stagger them ever so slightly. You're an unnervingly precise clapper. Top stuff.
chewmeupspitmeout: This is very effective, feels like someone being flogged as they're marched up a hill. Big bruising rasps of distortion. I thought the edge of distortion on the main vocal was the right choice until the outro reminded me how lovely your natural voice is and I found myself wishing you'd left it clean throughout. Yes, yes, it'd undermine the point of the song. Counter-argument: you sing pretty. Pleased to hear you report that ChatGPT won't be winning SpinTunes until at least 2024.
Hot Pink Halo: Very harmonically open to begin with, the vocal melody carving its own path while the ukes stay hesitant and non-committal. Really catches the ear and builds expectation; my brain's guessing at the missing harmonies. Each chorus gains a little confidence, but you keep us waiting so that those final harmony vocals are like rain after a drought. Very intriguing, and fits well with the upfront but oblique lyrics. I found myself hoping for a bass instrument to come in and anchor things for a proper, solid final dance - it's all I ever wanted - but life ain't like that. (The Taskmaster clips you posted are region-blocked here, so all I have is a teaser image of Bob Mortimer and the undoubtedly bonkers song he would have sung.)
Mandrake: The synth sounds in the intro didn't grab me at first (though I can see why you chose them thematically), but things soon click into place. The microtuning and time signature give the surface-calm moments a slightly woozy, disoriented feel, and contrast well with the abrasive gameboy-in-a-microwave intrusions. The outro groove's my favourite bit. It feels like a working compromise (or truce?) between the listless and the brutal - anxiety harnessed well. Or maybe it's just a cool groove and I'm overthinking it. (P.S. I'd love to hear your voice more clearly. Do you have access to another mic? Your current one is sucking away all the top end, so the microtonality doesn't really come across in your singing.)
Phew. Glad I don't have to rank these. Do you favour end result or commitment to theme? Sucks to be a judge. My favourite's Pannacotta by a hair.
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furrypedro
- Ice Cream Man
- Posts: 1265
- Joined: Mon Nov 07, 2005 12:06 pm
- Instruments: Guitar, programming
- Recording Method: Cubase, Reason
- Submitting as: Balance Lost
- Location: Kyoto
- Contact:
Re: Spin Tunes 20 Round 3 Challenge - Self Improvement
Thanks so much for the reviews! (that goes to all who have reviewed so far this spintunes too!)
You're totally right about that frequency range being too much. It's probably a combination of my lack of expertise and crappy software, but I don't know how to make stuff punchy and bright, without that fatiguing sound. So I opt to push everything, almost definitely beyond reasonable limits, so I can hear all the instrument as I want. I would love to know if there is a tutorial for how to get clarity and brightness in rock mixes, especially for singers with lower range vocals, without overdoing that frequency range. I think it's as much a problem with how I EQ distorted guitars as it is the vocals but I wonder if I'm missing some magic box that makes it all better (and costs the price of a US ambulance ride).
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Siebass
- A New Player
- Posts: 7
- Joined: Wed Apr 05, 2023 11:38 am
- Submitting as: Siebass
- Pronouns: he/him
Re: Spin Tunes 20 Round 3 Challenge - Self Improvement
ST20 - R3 - Siebass' Reviews
I felt like just a general comment for almost all of round 3 that the arrangement/structure just wasn't as interesting across all of the songs on average, and I found myself getting a bit bored 2/3rds to 3/4th of the way through many, many of the songs; maybe it was a solo that MIGHT not need to be there, or didn't change things musically, or was a little too long for me, or there was one more verse or an extra chorus or something. I'm 90% sure it's just my personal taste and general preference for more midtempo, uptempo, groovy type stuff. I'm a pop and rock monkey, and my attention span is *squirrel!*... not what it used to be; maybe attention span of a chickadee would be appropriate for this round. It's not like the songs are particularly long. It felt like there were a lot of very solid downtempo and midtempo songs here that IMHO may have benefitted from more care in the edit phase or arrangement phase, or that there was more dead space in a lot of songs this time. Perhaps we were all burned out from the really really strong Round 2? I know I was and didn't have as much energy for arrangement and polish this round. Or this could all just be me, who knows? I can only talk about how I feel.
Review Disclaimer: This is my hobby; most of what I know is from doing, and watching loads of videos about mixing, production, singing, etc. on the internet. I've only got my ears, my tastes, what I like and what I hear, so take anything I say with an Atlas' Globe-sized grain of salt. I try to be kind, and also helpful, so take anything I say as something to consider, listen to, and decide if you feel the same way about. I'll try to provide something critical as best I can in that vein; some are stretches, and simply my thoughts as an amateur musician. I hope what I have to say is helpful to everyone, even if just as something to think about.
1.
The Popped Hearts - Tusen Takk 02:02 - Learning Norwegian is probably tough, steel drums work well with this earnestly sung and happy song. Excellent use of a vibraslap, ala Cake. Vocals could probably have used a bit more care on pitching and emotion in verse 1, and when there is harmony in the chorus, but minor. Enjoyed the...melodica? Very happy earnest upbeats, fun song, fun panning, gives me a smile. Ending on the dissonant note threw me a little for such a joyful song. I enjoyed it.
2.
Daniel Sitler - Everything Ends (Epilogue) 04:13 - Really fun string pads/synth pads. It's scary to improvise song lyrics on the fly. I've only done once for a skirmish in FAWM and it was very hard to let go, so well done. I still think this sort of song, even while improvised in creation, can benefit from an edit pass afterwards, as this one just went on a bit too long for me. The vocal is lovely, as are the low hums, the airy pads, and the echoes across the large space you created. The lyric lands for me well also, an earnest hope for someone to repay a favor and the gap of not knowing, but hoping they will. Very solid. Again, my only gripe is it goes on a bit too long for me personally, and feels like it loses a bit of focus after all the droning; it lost my interest a bit. Still very good, and I enjoyed it.
3.
Stacking Theory - Something That Was Never There 04:27 - Crop circles, fun topic. Love the phasey vocal. Heavy autotune on the main vox, I think I've noted on each one of these, so at this point I'm assuming it's just the style of Stacking Theory. It can make it hard to understand the lyrics with the phaser in the chorus a little bit. Lovely harmonies, very lovely mix and production, I dig it. Looking for something that was never there is a great line too; nice ha's to bring the energy back down, solid transition. I also like the percussion. Is that the coffee shop duder from Logic? Dug the chill vibe on this, very solid. IT'S TURTLES ALL THE WAY DOWN!!!
4.
Balance Lost - Fade to White 03:51 - Parallel compression is an extremely useful technique for getting the best of both worlds in terms of transients and blending in natural sounds, especially nice for bass guitars, drums, etc, so glad you are digging into that! Logic makes it dead simple to do if you use any of their built-in compressors to mix the wet and dry compression, so I put that on almost every track. Reverse reverb is a fun pop trick on a ton of vocals when coming back in from a drop/silence/intro, so both very useful and fun tools to add to your belt. Well done. Opening guitar and vocal both sound a bit hot to my ear like they're clipping a little. Nice fat bass tone. Whole track feels a bit smushed in the mix, like the guitars and drums are fighting, or maybe the whole thing is a bit overcompressed to my ear? Kick drum and snare are disappearing a bit as well due to how full the arrangement is in the louder bits. Perhaps consider some eq to make some space for them or even MOAR parallel compression? Not sure, I'm only an amateur. Love how you come back down to the lighter instrumentation before the second verse. Lovely solo and guitar tone, This was a head bobber for sure, good rhythm, I enjoyed it.
5.
The Pannacotta Army - From The Beginning 03:42 - One of my favs of the round, great work using just the one instrument, geat a great groove, island vibe, and almost bongo/congo drum sounds out of the instrument, and sorry to hear about the rice! You can bag it first before rolling it around to help on the cleanup if you do that again. Such a great summer vibe here, and I really got into the upstroke rhythm. Just a song like a summer breeze in a hammock. For your introduction to foley, this is a very strong entry. Love the vocal harmonies throughout and teh ba ba ba sections, but mainly I just grooved to this with a smile on my face.
6.
Jeff Walker - With My Angels 03:16 - Combination of the 80's style ballad instrumentation against the rapid-fire delivery is interesting. Concept of paranoid schizophrenia and all the crazy things seen. I think this works, and some clever lyric work here. I think the vocal feels a bit dry to my ear in the verses on the rapid-fire spoken portions. Perhaps consider a vocal double or a hair more verb? I enjoyed the shift to the bubble burst portion in the lyrics, and this was an easy listen, well made. Solid solo.
7.
Siebass - There's Music All Around 03:38 - Itsa me, Siebass.
8.
The Alleviators - Figure This 04:39 - I enjoyed the Georgie James style doubled female vocal. I really like the upbeat feel of this and the lyrics; the mix felt a little bit rough to my ear, maybe just on levels? Bass and vocals feel good, some other elements feel a little buried and small, to my ear. My other quibble was that I felt, again to my ear, like the female vocal was about 20-50ms late, possibly throughout the track, but most noticeably on the chorus on the push me to the limits, and marvelous and messys. The male vocal I don't hear that timing issue, so that's something to listen for; it took me out of the song a little bit on a song that I otherwise enjoyed immensely. Really fun. Regrettably played this while my kids were still awake, but mercifully they did not catch the swearing. Very catchy chorus, enjoyed the traded male and female vocals/verses and choruses, and the wa ah ohs. Well constructed and I enjoyed it a lot. Mando is hard to learn I heard, as is doing vocals on the go, so props for that.
9.
Bubba & The Ghost of the Kraken - Castle Čachtice 02:41 - Another one of my favs from the round. Learning about real(?) vampire nobles. Very polished production, really fun rhythm in this, catchy chorus, good rhyming around the stickys. I have nothing to say that comes to mind other than I enjoyed it a lot.
10.
Ironbark - Bit By Bit 02:52 - Big props on learning the cello for this, sounds like it would be a struggle, but I like how you worked the learning process into how the song is done, from starting out knowing how to be cruel and slowly learning to be kinder; especially the line you had about getting to a 3.7 out of ten. This song grew on me more after more listens, lyrics are spot on, and the dissonant notes feel purposeful and spur the song on in a good way. Fun accents for the birds, and bit by bit. I think my only quibble might be with the drums, they don't sound as clean and polished as every other instrument in the song; not sure if it's the room, the verb, or maybe some parallel compression, or maybe just how dead the snare is? Perhaps the timing is a little off from time to time to my ear? That's all I've got. I enjoyed this song very much.
11.
Cavedwellers - The Wrong One 04:20 - Phasey flangey vibey here. Solid mix here, interesting rhythm with the accents on those last two beats. I'm listening for the doubled harmonies moving around now, but I may not be able to pick it out with my ear buds and amateur ears; I caught it with the guitarmonies at least. Interesting progression, I think the neatest thing for me here was the rhythm and progression. Solid guitar solos and tones, bass tone, fairly polished mix. If I search for something; attack of the kick drum is a bit buried in the louder parts to my ear. Descending vocal melody in the chorus was fun, and nice drop chorus.
12.
Jealous Brother - No Harm Will Come Your Way 03:51 - Harmonium seems like it'd be tricky to learn. Nice mid focus eq to open to have things feel tiny, but slowly opening up the low end. Key change is a nice change up for the solo, and fun big sounds. Droney groove based song, nice descending and walking bassline, and harmonies, bass fuzz. I guess all I'd really have to say is perhaps consider at least shortening the solo in the middle of the song as something to think about? It goes on for quite a bit. Very solid song, nice tambo add for the last sung section before the solo out.
13.
Tunes By LJ - Salty Air 02:31 - Another one of my favs from the round. More synthy piano style and flair from Tunes by LJ. Reminds me of the soundtracks for the Persona video games, lots of light vocals, smooth basslines and dancing keys. Really fun rhythm and percussion in this, little steel drum, love when the bass comes in, when the drums come in. This is a groove, head bob, dancey song. Love all the accents in there on the keys, vocal melody really pulls the listener through the song. Brings it back down to start verse 2 always a nice turn. Polished. I guess if I'd have to try to come up with something to say, maybe a bit more in chorus two than one; it feels like it might be the same? Hard to say anything. Fun tape stop to end. Great work.
14.
Phlub - I Love Them Chickadees 02:03 - Really fun, loads of chickadees. I enjoyed this one as well, feels like something you'd hear spinning on vinyl. Very catchy chorus, enjoyed the harmonies. My only quibble would be that to me, the breakdown was a bit long without a ton going on, and I got a little bored in that section. It's a super short song, very punchy in and out, so maybe it's just a testament to my lack of attention span. I didn't hear you saying chickadee in there the first time I heard it during the breakdown, but did this time when I was listening for it. Maybe consider cutting it at the 1:19 portion instead of continuing for such a long time in the breakdown and birdsong? Just my thoughts. Really great work, another phlub chorus burrows into my brain.
15.
Governing Dynamics - Whisper Gentle Rain 03:45 - Really nice slide playing, got that bittersweet feel to it, very nice. The 9/8 here feels like a waltz with the one two three feel; I don't think I've ever tried 9/8, so I don't know what else it might feel like. Perhaps a hair more pitch correction on the really nice airy vocal take in verse one on the very first stanza? Perhaps another thing to consider would be dynamics shifts from coming back to verse 2 from the chorus; but you do that for the solo, so maybe down some for verse 2 and then down more to where it strips down for the solo? Just thoughts. Great build up of energy into the last chorus. Same thought for consideration on the outro last bit perhaps cut away even more to leave those vocals out there for a more intimate connection and feel? Well done song.
16.
Temnere - Destiny Awaits 03:53 - Feels like a metal shanty, it's cool. I think I have the same issue here with the mix that I had with the last Temnere, where it feels really narrow and small, not sure if it's the mastering level, the stereo image, or something just with me; not sure if that's something that others hear. I have some trouble deciphering the vocals without the lyric sheet, but the attitude is spot on. Really fun pirateering song, great drum work or programming and guitar riff work, accordion VST. My favorite parts were the layered harmony parts, the hey hey heys, whoas, and the general destiny seeking portions. Glad you were able to have fun with the foley elements. Are the chains in the 3:40 tamborine-ish part? Well done.
17.
Mandibles - What Just Happened? 02:55 Great groove to open, I get thrown off a bit by the groove swap to the mando-and-almost-rennaissance feel from the intro to the verse. Vocals feel a bit thin in the opening verse; maybe consider a secret lower-register double at the level you can barely hear but can FEEL to really help thicken a main vocal in a sneaky way? Great layered harmonies in the chorus, and as stated it must be really tough to learn an instrument for this challenge, so good show. Lyrics work well in capturing that growing disconnect and spilling out with wrong words in the heat of the moment. I really dig the bassline in the "A" parts. Solid solo, really sweet guitar tones, perhaps a tad long for my tastes here, at least perhaps something to consider for shorter solo and maybe a bridge instead of a long outro? Well played and mixed. Sorry to hear things are/were not going well re: lyrical content.
18.
Sober - O Sweet Death 03:48 - Well this is great and you probably know it. Another one of my favorites of the round. Well done on the fretless and really nice violin, mando/banjo, claps and stomps. Really great opening line in hold my hand like it's work; Chorus of oh sweet death come for me/let me die, let me die as well hits hard, excellent vocal take with great emotion and vocal fry. Head bob on the pulse of the stomps and claps and hits on the fretless really glue this together. Searching for constructive criticism, perhap the vocal a little hot for my taste, and the violin a little scratchy and pushed back in the mix, but for obvious reasons. Really enjoyed the drop chorus half at the end, worked great for this song, and all the melissimo throughout, tambo at the end, all really nice touches. Hard to believe you manage this in only the less-than-three-hours before the closing bell?
My personal favs this round in order of appearance were:
Panacotta Army - From the Beginning
Bubba & Ghost of Kraken - Castle Čachtice
Tunes by LJ - Salty Air
Sober - O Sweet Death
19.
chewmeupspitmeout - Condemn Me [SHADOW] 03:20 - This is another great song that I think is held back a bit by the mix. Opening is great with the claps and the humming. The microphone sounds way too hot to me on the levels such that it's clipping in a way that's unpleasant to my ear to open this on the first condemn me. Same for the harmonica there? It sounds to my ear that the volume just needs to be brought down to avoid the clipping and the song would be much improved. I love the stomps, claps, drum programming. Might be a bit too much in the high mids on the distorted guitar for my taste as well. Really liked the vocal take otherwise, the lyrics, and the rhythm, as well as the big shifts from no drums to heavy electronic drums, as well as the lyrics. Really cool one.
20.
Hot Pink Halo - All The Information Is On The Task [SHADOW] 02:23 - Super impressed that you managed to refret and rebridge and repair the uke for this song. Nice light playing and vocal double works along with the simple. Brace for the bloodbath was my favorite line. To my ear could benefit from some pitch correction in the verse and chorus. Heartfelt sentiment. Hopefully the people are dancing.
21.
Mandrake - What if? [SHADOW] 03:48 - cool beats and chiptunes as always. Vocal feels a bit nasally? Perhaps it's a side effect of the inward singing. For the mix, to my ear, perhaps could use a bit more carve out from the rest of the mix for a place for the vocals to sit, or perhaps levels wise could be louder? Particularly I have a hard time around 2:12 hearing and understanding. Inward singing bits are a bit hard to understand without the lyrics bit; especially around 1:12, sounds almost demonic. White noise sweep to drop around 2:45 is very nice, as are the glockenspiel like rounded tones throughout mixed with the chiptune like sounds. Outro a little long for my tastes here as well, but I think that's likely just my personal preference. Solid song solid mix overall, I enjoyed it.
I felt like just a general comment for almost all of round 3 that the arrangement/structure just wasn't as interesting across all of the songs on average, and I found myself getting a bit bored 2/3rds to 3/4th of the way through many, many of the songs; maybe it was a solo that MIGHT not need to be there, or didn't change things musically, or was a little too long for me, or there was one more verse or an extra chorus or something. I'm 90% sure it's just my personal taste and general preference for more midtempo, uptempo, groovy type stuff. I'm a pop and rock monkey, and my attention span is *squirrel!*... not what it used to be; maybe attention span of a chickadee would be appropriate for this round. It's not like the songs are particularly long. It felt like there were a lot of very solid downtempo and midtempo songs here that IMHO may have benefitted from more care in the edit phase or arrangement phase, or that there was more dead space in a lot of songs this time. Perhaps we were all burned out from the really really strong Round 2? I know I was and didn't have as much energy for arrangement and polish this round. Or this could all just be me, who knows? I can only talk about how I feel.
Review Disclaimer: This is my hobby; most of what I know is from doing, and watching loads of videos about mixing, production, singing, etc. on the internet. I've only got my ears, my tastes, what I like and what I hear, so take anything I say with an Atlas' Globe-sized grain of salt. I try to be kind, and also helpful, so take anything I say as something to consider, listen to, and decide if you feel the same way about. I'll try to provide something critical as best I can in that vein; some are stretches, and simply my thoughts as an amateur musician. I hope what I have to say is helpful to everyone, even if just as something to think about.
1.
The Popped Hearts - Tusen Takk 02:02 - Learning Norwegian is probably tough, steel drums work well with this earnestly sung and happy song. Excellent use of a vibraslap, ala Cake. Vocals could probably have used a bit more care on pitching and emotion in verse 1, and when there is harmony in the chorus, but minor. Enjoyed the...melodica? Very happy earnest upbeats, fun song, fun panning, gives me a smile. Ending on the dissonant note threw me a little for such a joyful song. I enjoyed it.
2.
Daniel Sitler - Everything Ends (Epilogue) 04:13 - Really fun string pads/synth pads. It's scary to improvise song lyrics on the fly. I've only done once for a skirmish in FAWM and it was very hard to let go, so well done. I still think this sort of song, even while improvised in creation, can benefit from an edit pass afterwards, as this one just went on a bit too long for me. The vocal is lovely, as are the low hums, the airy pads, and the echoes across the large space you created. The lyric lands for me well also, an earnest hope for someone to repay a favor and the gap of not knowing, but hoping they will. Very solid. Again, my only gripe is it goes on a bit too long for me personally, and feels like it loses a bit of focus after all the droning; it lost my interest a bit. Still very good, and I enjoyed it.
3.
Stacking Theory - Something That Was Never There 04:27 - Crop circles, fun topic. Love the phasey vocal. Heavy autotune on the main vox, I think I've noted on each one of these, so at this point I'm assuming it's just the style of Stacking Theory. It can make it hard to understand the lyrics with the phaser in the chorus a little bit. Lovely harmonies, very lovely mix and production, I dig it. Looking for something that was never there is a great line too; nice ha's to bring the energy back down, solid transition. I also like the percussion. Is that the coffee shop duder from Logic? Dug the chill vibe on this, very solid. IT'S TURTLES ALL THE WAY DOWN!!!
4.
Balance Lost - Fade to White 03:51 - Parallel compression is an extremely useful technique for getting the best of both worlds in terms of transients and blending in natural sounds, especially nice for bass guitars, drums, etc, so glad you are digging into that! Logic makes it dead simple to do if you use any of their built-in compressors to mix the wet and dry compression, so I put that on almost every track. Reverse reverb is a fun pop trick on a ton of vocals when coming back in from a drop/silence/intro, so both very useful and fun tools to add to your belt. Well done. Opening guitar and vocal both sound a bit hot to my ear like they're clipping a little. Nice fat bass tone. Whole track feels a bit smushed in the mix, like the guitars and drums are fighting, or maybe the whole thing is a bit overcompressed to my ear? Kick drum and snare are disappearing a bit as well due to how full the arrangement is in the louder bits. Perhaps consider some eq to make some space for them or even MOAR parallel compression? Not sure, I'm only an amateur. Love how you come back down to the lighter instrumentation before the second verse. Lovely solo and guitar tone, This was a head bobber for sure, good rhythm, I enjoyed it.
5.
The Pannacotta Army - From The Beginning 03:42 - One of my favs of the round, great work using just the one instrument, geat a great groove, island vibe, and almost bongo/congo drum sounds out of the instrument, and sorry to hear about the rice! You can bag it first before rolling it around to help on the cleanup if you do that again. Such a great summer vibe here, and I really got into the upstroke rhythm. Just a song like a summer breeze in a hammock. For your introduction to foley, this is a very strong entry. Love the vocal harmonies throughout and teh ba ba ba sections, but mainly I just grooved to this with a smile on my face.
6.
Jeff Walker - With My Angels 03:16 - Combination of the 80's style ballad instrumentation against the rapid-fire delivery is interesting. Concept of paranoid schizophrenia and all the crazy things seen. I think this works, and some clever lyric work here. I think the vocal feels a bit dry to my ear in the verses on the rapid-fire spoken portions. Perhaps consider a vocal double or a hair more verb? I enjoyed the shift to the bubble burst portion in the lyrics, and this was an easy listen, well made. Solid solo.
7.
Siebass - There's Music All Around 03:38 - Itsa me, Siebass.
8.
The Alleviators - Figure This 04:39 - I enjoyed the Georgie James style doubled female vocal. I really like the upbeat feel of this and the lyrics; the mix felt a little bit rough to my ear, maybe just on levels? Bass and vocals feel good, some other elements feel a little buried and small, to my ear. My other quibble was that I felt, again to my ear, like the female vocal was about 20-50ms late, possibly throughout the track, but most noticeably on the chorus on the push me to the limits, and marvelous and messys. The male vocal I don't hear that timing issue, so that's something to listen for; it took me out of the song a little bit on a song that I otherwise enjoyed immensely. Really fun. Regrettably played this while my kids were still awake, but mercifully they did not catch the swearing. Very catchy chorus, enjoyed the traded male and female vocals/verses and choruses, and the wa ah ohs. Well constructed and I enjoyed it a lot. Mando is hard to learn I heard, as is doing vocals on the go, so props for that.
9.
Bubba & The Ghost of the Kraken - Castle Čachtice 02:41 - Another one of my favs from the round. Learning about real(?) vampire nobles. Very polished production, really fun rhythm in this, catchy chorus, good rhyming around the stickys. I have nothing to say that comes to mind other than I enjoyed it a lot.
10.
Ironbark - Bit By Bit 02:52 - Big props on learning the cello for this, sounds like it would be a struggle, but I like how you worked the learning process into how the song is done, from starting out knowing how to be cruel and slowly learning to be kinder; especially the line you had about getting to a 3.7 out of ten. This song grew on me more after more listens, lyrics are spot on, and the dissonant notes feel purposeful and spur the song on in a good way. Fun accents for the birds, and bit by bit. I think my only quibble might be with the drums, they don't sound as clean and polished as every other instrument in the song; not sure if it's the room, the verb, or maybe some parallel compression, or maybe just how dead the snare is? Perhaps the timing is a little off from time to time to my ear? That's all I've got. I enjoyed this song very much.
11.
Cavedwellers - The Wrong One 04:20 - Phasey flangey vibey here. Solid mix here, interesting rhythm with the accents on those last two beats. I'm listening for the doubled harmonies moving around now, but I may not be able to pick it out with my ear buds and amateur ears; I caught it with the guitarmonies at least. Interesting progression, I think the neatest thing for me here was the rhythm and progression. Solid guitar solos and tones, bass tone, fairly polished mix. If I search for something; attack of the kick drum is a bit buried in the louder parts to my ear. Descending vocal melody in the chorus was fun, and nice drop chorus.
12.
Jealous Brother - No Harm Will Come Your Way 03:51 - Harmonium seems like it'd be tricky to learn. Nice mid focus eq to open to have things feel tiny, but slowly opening up the low end. Key change is a nice change up for the solo, and fun big sounds. Droney groove based song, nice descending and walking bassline, and harmonies, bass fuzz. I guess all I'd really have to say is perhaps consider at least shortening the solo in the middle of the song as something to think about? It goes on for quite a bit. Very solid song, nice tambo add for the last sung section before the solo out.
13.
Tunes By LJ - Salty Air 02:31 - Another one of my favs from the round. More synthy piano style and flair from Tunes by LJ. Reminds me of the soundtracks for the Persona video games, lots of light vocals, smooth basslines and dancing keys. Really fun rhythm and percussion in this, little steel drum, love when the bass comes in, when the drums come in. This is a groove, head bob, dancey song. Love all the accents in there on the keys, vocal melody really pulls the listener through the song. Brings it back down to start verse 2 always a nice turn. Polished. I guess if I'd have to try to come up with something to say, maybe a bit more in chorus two than one; it feels like it might be the same? Hard to say anything. Fun tape stop to end. Great work.
14.
Phlub - I Love Them Chickadees 02:03 - Really fun, loads of chickadees. I enjoyed this one as well, feels like something you'd hear spinning on vinyl. Very catchy chorus, enjoyed the harmonies. My only quibble would be that to me, the breakdown was a bit long without a ton going on, and I got a little bored in that section. It's a super short song, very punchy in and out, so maybe it's just a testament to my lack of attention span. I didn't hear you saying chickadee in there the first time I heard it during the breakdown, but did this time when I was listening for it. Maybe consider cutting it at the 1:19 portion instead of continuing for such a long time in the breakdown and birdsong? Just my thoughts. Really great work, another phlub chorus burrows into my brain.
15.
Governing Dynamics - Whisper Gentle Rain 03:45 - Really nice slide playing, got that bittersweet feel to it, very nice. The 9/8 here feels like a waltz with the one two three feel; I don't think I've ever tried 9/8, so I don't know what else it might feel like. Perhaps a hair more pitch correction on the really nice airy vocal take in verse one on the very first stanza? Perhaps another thing to consider would be dynamics shifts from coming back to verse 2 from the chorus; but you do that for the solo, so maybe down some for verse 2 and then down more to where it strips down for the solo? Just thoughts. Great build up of energy into the last chorus. Same thought for consideration on the outro last bit perhaps cut away even more to leave those vocals out there for a more intimate connection and feel? Well done song.
16.
Temnere - Destiny Awaits 03:53 - Feels like a metal shanty, it's cool. I think I have the same issue here with the mix that I had with the last Temnere, where it feels really narrow and small, not sure if it's the mastering level, the stereo image, or something just with me; not sure if that's something that others hear. I have some trouble deciphering the vocals without the lyric sheet, but the attitude is spot on. Really fun pirateering song, great drum work or programming and guitar riff work, accordion VST. My favorite parts were the layered harmony parts, the hey hey heys, whoas, and the general destiny seeking portions. Glad you were able to have fun with the foley elements. Are the chains in the 3:40 tamborine-ish part? Well done.
17.
Mandibles - What Just Happened? 02:55 Great groove to open, I get thrown off a bit by the groove swap to the mando-and-almost-rennaissance feel from the intro to the verse. Vocals feel a bit thin in the opening verse; maybe consider a secret lower-register double at the level you can barely hear but can FEEL to really help thicken a main vocal in a sneaky way? Great layered harmonies in the chorus, and as stated it must be really tough to learn an instrument for this challenge, so good show. Lyrics work well in capturing that growing disconnect and spilling out with wrong words in the heat of the moment. I really dig the bassline in the "A" parts. Solid solo, really sweet guitar tones, perhaps a tad long for my tastes here, at least perhaps something to consider for shorter solo and maybe a bridge instead of a long outro? Well played and mixed. Sorry to hear things are/were not going well re: lyrical content.
18.
Sober - O Sweet Death 03:48 - Well this is great and you probably know it. Another one of my favorites of the round. Well done on the fretless and really nice violin, mando/banjo, claps and stomps. Really great opening line in hold my hand like it's work; Chorus of oh sweet death come for me/let me die, let me die as well hits hard, excellent vocal take with great emotion and vocal fry. Head bob on the pulse of the stomps and claps and hits on the fretless really glue this together. Searching for constructive criticism, perhap the vocal a little hot for my taste, and the violin a little scratchy and pushed back in the mix, but for obvious reasons. Really enjoyed the drop chorus half at the end, worked great for this song, and all the melissimo throughout, tambo at the end, all really nice touches. Hard to believe you manage this in only the less-than-three-hours before the closing bell?
My personal favs this round in order of appearance were:
Panacotta Army - From the Beginning
Bubba & Ghost of Kraken - Castle Čachtice
Tunes by LJ - Salty Air
Sober - O Sweet Death
19.
chewmeupspitmeout - Condemn Me [SHADOW] 03:20 - This is another great song that I think is held back a bit by the mix. Opening is great with the claps and the humming. The microphone sounds way too hot to me on the levels such that it's clipping in a way that's unpleasant to my ear to open this on the first condemn me. Same for the harmonica there? It sounds to my ear that the volume just needs to be brought down to avoid the clipping and the song would be much improved. I love the stomps, claps, drum programming. Might be a bit too much in the high mids on the distorted guitar for my taste as well. Really liked the vocal take otherwise, the lyrics, and the rhythm, as well as the big shifts from no drums to heavy electronic drums, as well as the lyrics. Really cool one.
20.
Hot Pink Halo - All The Information Is On The Task [SHADOW] 02:23 - Super impressed that you managed to refret and rebridge and repair the uke for this song. Nice light playing and vocal double works along with the simple. Brace for the bloodbath was my favorite line. To my ear could benefit from some pitch correction in the verse and chorus. Heartfelt sentiment. Hopefully the people are dancing.
21.
Mandrake - What if? [SHADOW] 03:48 - cool beats and chiptunes as always. Vocal feels a bit nasally? Perhaps it's a side effect of the inward singing. For the mix, to my ear, perhaps could use a bit more carve out from the rest of the mix for a place for the vocals to sit, or perhaps levels wise could be louder? Particularly I have a hard time around 2:12 hearing and understanding. Inward singing bits are a bit hard to understand without the lyrics bit; especially around 1:12, sounds almost demonic. White noise sweep to drop around 2:45 is very nice, as are the glockenspiel like rounded tones throughout mixed with the chiptune like sounds. Outro a little long for my tastes here as well, but I think that's likely just my personal preference. Solid song solid mix overall, I enjoyed it.
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Siebass
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Re: Spin Tunes 20 Round 3 Challenge - Self Improvement
I mean, one thing to consider with this is to rank your sounds that are stepping on each other in order of importance. What's the most important thing to be in that range at that time? Next most, next most, and then focus on giving the most of that EQ range to the element that is most important at that time. Another thing to consider is automation; if the cymbal hiss is more important than that range at one point in the song, automate the eq to have less in the guitar there, and vice versa if the guitar is more important in tha range later. Third is my favorite parallel compression, it can help things cut without losing definition, and then you can clear out the eq from the harshie highs and high mids and still have some goodness in the other ranges. Last I'd shill some of my fun Izotope stuff, in that their neutron eq lets you see what frequencies are masking others, and tonal balance control lets you isolate and listen to just the lows, just the low mids, high mids, and highs in solo and compare against other songs in a chosen genre, so you can hear what it is that's sitting in that large band range, and can tell "Oooo, my vocal is too much there in the high mids, or the high hat needs a bit of a push" etc. Just stuff to think about.furrypedro wrote: ↑Fri Apr 21, 2023 6:49 amThanks so much for the reviews! (that goes to all who have reviewed so far this spintunes too!)
You're totally right about that frequency range being too much. It's probably a combination of my lack of expertise and crappy software, but I don't know how to make stuff punchy and bright, without that fatiguing sound. So I opt to push everything, almost definitely beyond reasonable limits, so I can hear all the instrument as I want. I would love to know if there is a tutorial for how to get clarity and brightness in rock mixes, especially for singers with lower range vocals, without overdoing that frequency range. I think it's as much a problem with how I EQ distorted guitars as it is the vocals but I wonder if I'm missing some magic box that makes it all better (and costs the price of a US ambulance ride).
-Josh
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sleepysilverdoor
- Ice Cream Man
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Re: Spin Tunes 20 Round 3 Challenge - Self Improvement
Popped Hearts - Tusan Takk: Okay I find this entire concept fun. Steel drums in a song about Norway absolutely does not fit *at all* but it’s so charming that who cares? And the plukk den opp part just put a big dumb grin on my face. This has that kind of quirky college radio vibe that’s infectious. Ending on a completely different chord that you hadn’t hit at all throughout the song was an interesting choice. Very memorable.
Daniel Sitler - So you made this up as you went? I’m curious what your process was. Did you record the lyrics first? Or the drone? The musical backing seems to follow the lyrics so I’m going to assume this was originally an a capella track that you fleshed out with other stuff. As for coming up with lyrics off of the dome, I’ve never been very good at it beyond just free associating random images and rhymes so I’ll always be impressed. The reverb here is a good touch if only because it adds a bit to the “emotion” of the thing. This kind of gives me the same vibes as Radiohead’s Motion Picture Soundtrack. The harmonies and slow swells are nice. I will say after the listening party this mostly stick in my head as “the slow ambient one”. Impressive that this was all improvised!
Stacking Theory - Someday I’m going to take a trip to Melbourne and we’re gonna go make some crop circles. Or maybe we’ll just jam it out and write some sad beach music. If I ever actually make it to Melbourne that is (unlikely). The introduction of the quiet guitar near the back half of the first verse was well done. I think the vocal processing could probably be a little less prominent, this has a very audible “melodyne” sound that honestly I don’t think you need (having heard your vocals enough times over the years). Progression of the song is well done, and if there was anything else that I could possibly criticize beyond your vocal processing I’d just say “this sounds like other Stacking Theory songs” but I couldn’t specify exactly which one. Mixing is terrific. I like this a lot.
Balance Lost - I’m a sucker for reverse reverb, it’s a fun way to give your song a bit of a ghostly vibe. Though admittedly this song isn’t very ghostly at all, nor it is particularly psychedelic so I don’t know if the reverse reverb really does the song a service? Your notes say that it was intended to add a degree of drama to the proceedings but I don’t know if it actually does. The drums on the other hand, yes, using parallel compression was a great idea and I think it does wonders for the mix. I use it on almost all of my drums! Sometimes I use it on other things. I suspect there’s some personal things referenced in the lyrics that I don’t totally understand. ACTUALLY here’s an idea that you can ignore if you want – the time to fade in the reverse reverb is the “fading into white bit”, because the reverse reverb really adds a “faded” element to the vocals. That’s all I’ve really got!
Panacotta Army - You put rice in your guitar? I want to yell at you for that. But it has a great effect and if you hadn’t told me that all of the percussion in this track was all on your guitar I would have *never* guessed. That chord shift leading in and out of the chorus is *sublime* – I’m jealous that you came up with it because I wouldn’t have. Ah, there it is again, I love it. This is so well produced and I’m a sucker for a good babababa. How do I even critique this and how on earth do you routinely come up with such a quality product for the short turnaround time of contests like this? I hope you know when I compete with you on songfight I consider it a personal victory if I outrank you cause you kick my butt so often! Terrific.
Jeff Walker - Oh that slow slide guitar crawling around in the background here is such a vibe. And the slight delay you stick on your vocals in the chorus holy carp what a nice touch for this. I’m not going to lie, I kind of prefer the straightforward sung parts in this, not because you’re bad at your rapping (the triplet flows are a nice touch) but just cause you sound so much more refined and comfortable singing like that. No idea how to tell you to improve it beyond just…do it more until you really find a groove with a more hip-hop inspired cadence? Guitar work is great and I wanna give you a high five just cause this sounds delicious.
Siebass - The intro is entertaining and I’ll happy call people cob knobblers in the future and I thank you for having that enter my lexicon. Maybe boosting the bass on your beatboxing would be a nice touch from a mixing standpoint? The “then I heard it” part kind of loses the beat to an extent, but it comes back once the chorus comes back. I’m not sure how much the crowd noise adds – tbh I think I would like this a bit better if it cut the intro despite the lols. The rap verse is really terrific lyrically; I love the musical puns. The surprise guitar solo is fun, and so is the yell of crack spackler (even though I’m not sure it benefits the song). If I had to suggest anything in particular I’d just give that prechorus a do-over. Something about it doesn’t work for me. Beatboxing almost the whole song was a great challenge and the “oh my goodness I turned into a guitar” was silly in a very endearing way.
Alleviators - I don’t know why but the number 742 follows my wife I around. I don’t know what psychological phenomenon it is but everywhere we look there it is. And hey, what’s right at the start of this song but *THAT NUMBER*. Anyway, mandolins are really fun! It feels a little dry in the mix or maybe the hard left panning is doing it a disservice in the mix, I’m not sure what to recommend there. I record mine simultaneously with its built-in pickup and a microphone to get it to fill out the stereo a bit better and it seems to work?. I like the synth washes going on in the prechorus and I wish there were more of them! <space solo> sounded nice. Would like to hear a bit more build up going into the chorus, but if half the band was stuck on a road trip while recording this I get it! I like the lyrical themes going on here.
Bubba & The Ghost of the Kraken - What on earth kind of idea is it to write a peppy number with a hint of funk…about BATHORY of all people, goodness gracious what a terrible figure from history. There’s this thing you do where it feels like you’re periodically inserting a beat or two and that deviation from the strict 4/4 grid really keeps this compelling. The vocals get a little hard to understand around the “lord please watch over the souls of these ladies”, maybe some eq-ing or just a volume boost could really bring them out? I wish the melody of this had more notes in it. I feel like spend most of the song just hitting the same 2 or 3 notes and it starts to feel…one note after awhile? Moving around your vocal range more would have made this a lot more compelling, though a tale of that horrible person is indeed compelling in its own way.
Ironbark - You’re so very new at cello and I know that cello – and really most fretless instruments – are a pain in the butt to learn how to play properly. Probably a safe bet that your cello part is about as simple as it gets. What all instruments are even in this? I hear a banjo, a synthesizer, some drums. There’s a few bowed high notes where you get into higher territory and I kind of forget its a cello for a bit. Oh there’s a piano! And now triplets! What is that ending, it just…stops? Anyway, this was fun in a twee sort of way. I don’t know if it reached the heights you set for yourself in the previous rounds – not much here really grabbed me melodically? I was starting to have a lot of fun with the changeups to the overall song you were adding, so if you revisit this maybe speed it up a little and really dive into the quirky side of this track cause it’s there and just begging to be emphasised!
Cavedwellers - By far the most infectious part of this song is the guitar production and the dueling harmonies which is precisely the part you said was new to you. So A+ on this. What kind of guitar pedal are you using for that shimmery chorus sound? It’s divine and I want it. It sounds kind of like my Dimension C but I don’t think it’s that? Guitar solo after the second verse is so very abrupt and I wish there was at least a little more transition into it? But that doesn’t mean I don’t like it, ugh I like this stereo doubled guitar sound a lot! Yeah, the transitions in this song are all very abrupt, so I feel like I have to ding it for that I guess but…ugh, those guitars, yum. Is it weird that I simultaneously love the guitar playing on this song while not really finding the song itself compelling? Oh man those guitars sound good.
Phlub - It’s me. I already said a whole lot about this song in its bio. But I didn’t mention that I’m planning on getting a tattoo of a chickadee here soon as a tribute to my dad, the great “chickadee Bob” who legitimately loved the little birds. So hopefully that’ll turn out well.
Jealous Brother - Harmoniums to me sound like a combination of a melodica and an accordion but I know they’re really something else all together. This tune starts to pick up steam as it gets on, and I like the way that it progresses. I find the start of it a bit slow. That ascending line into the guitar with “so dry” is cool, and I start really digging the instrumental. The long instrumental break really is a joy to listen to, and the chord progression is sublime. I will say that for whatever reason the vocal parts of this don’t really grab me at all – they aren’t bad, maybe it’s just my mood - and I find myself wishing that it was just a really groovy instrumental! But that outro I could have on loop for an hour and be fine.
Tunes By LJ - This song sounds like something that would be playing at that hip coffee shop. Y’know, the one with the big potted ferns by the door and the art deco posters on the wall. House influences are really working and whatever EP setting you have going is a great choice sonically. I can’t say that I really noticed the key change all that much, largely because G and C are so close together harmonically anyway, so rather than thinking “wow an unexpected key change” it’s more like “wow, this is really smooth”, which given the genre is probably exactly what you want. Vocals sound great. This sounds like it was really fun to write. So chill.
Governing Dynamics - I’m a sucker for slide guitar playing and so this naturally grabbed my attention from the start. Even whether or not this is truly 9/8 – I would have just called it ¾ based on the way that it grabs my ear – this gets a pass just for learning slide guitar which often sounds like a sloppy mess in the wrong hands! Very mellow, and I like the way this moves. Production is great, and every time that slide comes in I’m satisfied. There’s one point near the end on the slide guitar you hit a note kind of flat but it winds up coming closer to a just major third whether you intended to or not so thanks for the microtonal moment cause it sounded good whether or not you intended it to.
Temnere - Interesting results on the drums! I thought this was live but there’s a couple moments that give it away, mainly the quick drum fills on the snare which never have that sharp of an attack in real life. I’m completely unfamiliar with your reference material…searching curta’n wall juts got me to a bunch of picture of architecture and I don’t think that was what you were intending. Very fun to listen to. There’s that guitar stab you do at various points that has this slapback reverb on it but I feel like it would sound a little bit better if you took the delay off of it just a little bit.
Cybronica - The tempo changes are nice and unexpected, as are the concurrent meter changes. Happy to hear more mandolin popping up here! There are some moments where I think you could benefit from some vocal compression. Like in the runup to “writing this song” your voice kind of gets lost in the mix. There’s some timing issues with the instrumental that are quite audible but for learning a new instrument it is totally understandable! Maybe some more workshopping would take this from good to great.
Sober - Naturally a sad topic to write about but the ever present emotions in your singing carry it as well as one could so A+ there. The first time I heard this my brain immediately latched on to a few notes that were a bit flat in the bass – but then I saw that you were playing fretless for the first time and it all made a bit more sense. I couldn’t figure out which string was out of tune! Stomp/clap is well done. There’s something about the way that the clap sits in the mix – the reverb on it seems to have a bit more treble, I’d back off of the reverb and use a setting for a slightly larger room with more high end dampening. Beyond that I don’t have anything to complain about really!
Chewmeupspitmeout - I’m going to admit something – I asked chatgpt to write me lyrics about chickadees about 4 times and used some of the couplets that were output to guide me along the way. I didn’t do the whole song like that – the chorus was all me! The resultant images you got in this song definitely have some power but as predicted this doesn’t quite gel into a coherent narrative. But I wouldn’t expect it to. Compositionally this builds pretty well. Mix is a little bit muddy in places, like there’s too much low mids. Still haunting like most of your other songs, which is always a plus for me!
Hot Pink Halo - Reading about your endeavors made me want to refret my mandolin, but then I thought about it and I didn’t want to do anything to my sweet baby so maybe I’ll just save up for another one. I’m not 100% sure what your lyrics are about, but they provide a nice enough vessel for your instrumental and ukelele prowess! I’m not entirely sure what to criticize about this. It’s pleasant! You’ve written more engaging songs before but you’ve never refretted your ukelele for them!
Mandrake - I think your biggest weakness from a songwriting standpoint is that your vocals are never mixed very well. They’re all muffled and I can’t understand what you’re saying! Maybe some more breath support – though you inhaled half of these so that advice is probably worthless haha. Try high passing your vocal tracks. There’s a lot of low mids in your synth and drum production so it’s all kind of competing for space. I was trying to count this and kept getting lost. What tuning system did you use? We’re clearly in xenspace but I didn’t catch the tuning. The bleep bloops were excellently bleep bloop and blooped really well.
Daniel Sitler - So you made this up as you went? I’m curious what your process was. Did you record the lyrics first? Or the drone? The musical backing seems to follow the lyrics so I’m going to assume this was originally an a capella track that you fleshed out with other stuff. As for coming up with lyrics off of the dome, I’ve never been very good at it beyond just free associating random images and rhymes so I’ll always be impressed. The reverb here is a good touch if only because it adds a bit to the “emotion” of the thing. This kind of gives me the same vibes as Radiohead’s Motion Picture Soundtrack. The harmonies and slow swells are nice. I will say after the listening party this mostly stick in my head as “the slow ambient one”. Impressive that this was all improvised!
Stacking Theory - Someday I’m going to take a trip to Melbourne and we’re gonna go make some crop circles. Or maybe we’ll just jam it out and write some sad beach music. If I ever actually make it to Melbourne that is (unlikely). The introduction of the quiet guitar near the back half of the first verse was well done. I think the vocal processing could probably be a little less prominent, this has a very audible “melodyne” sound that honestly I don’t think you need (having heard your vocals enough times over the years). Progression of the song is well done, and if there was anything else that I could possibly criticize beyond your vocal processing I’d just say “this sounds like other Stacking Theory songs” but I couldn’t specify exactly which one. Mixing is terrific. I like this a lot.
Balance Lost - I’m a sucker for reverse reverb, it’s a fun way to give your song a bit of a ghostly vibe. Though admittedly this song isn’t very ghostly at all, nor it is particularly psychedelic so I don’t know if the reverse reverb really does the song a service? Your notes say that it was intended to add a degree of drama to the proceedings but I don’t know if it actually does. The drums on the other hand, yes, using parallel compression was a great idea and I think it does wonders for the mix. I use it on almost all of my drums! Sometimes I use it on other things. I suspect there’s some personal things referenced in the lyrics that I don’t totally understand. ACTUALLY here’s an idea that you can ignore if you want – the time to fade in the reverse reverb is the “fading into white bit”, because the reverse reverb really adds a “faded” element to the vocals. That’s all I’ve really got!
Panacotta Army - You put rice in your guitar? I want to yell at you for that. But it has a great effect and if you hadn’t told me that all of the percussion in this track was all on your guitar I would have *never* guessed. That chord shift leading in and out of the chorus is *sublime* – I’m jealous that you came up with it because I wouldn’t have. Ah, there it is again, I love it. This is so well produced and I’m a sucker for a good babababa. How do I even critique this and how on earth do you routinely come up with such a quality product for the short turnaround time of contests like this? I hope you know when I compete with you on songfight I consider it a personal victory if I outrank you cause you kick my butt so often! Terrific.
Jeff Walker - Oh that slow slide guitar crawling around in the background here is such a vibe. And the slight delay you stick on your vocals in the chorus holy carp what a nice touch for this. I’m not going to lie, I kind of prefer the straightforward sung parts in this, not because you’re bad at your rapping (the triplet flows are a nice touch) but just cause you sound so much more refined and comfortable singing like that. No idea how to tell you to improve it beyond just…do it more until you really find a groove with a more hip-hop inspired cadence? Guitar work is great and I wanna give you a high five just cause this sounds delicious.
Siebass - The intro is entertaining and I’ll happy call people cob knobblers in the future and I thank you for having that enter my lexicon. Maybe boosting the bass on your beatboxing would be a nice touch from a mixing standpoint? The “then I heard it” part kind of loses the beat to an extent, but it comes back once the chorus comes back. I’m not sure how much the crowd noise adds – tbh I think I would like this a bit better if it cut the intro despite the lols. The rap verse is really terrific lyrically; I love the musical puns. The surprise guitar solo is fun, and so is the yell of crack spackler (even though I’m not sure it benefits the song). If I had to suggest anything in particular I’d just give that prechorus a do-over. Something about it doesn’t work for me. Beatboxing almost the whole song was a great challenge and the “oh my goodness I turned into a guitar” was silly in a very endearing way.
Alleviators - I don’t know why but the number 742 follows my wife I around. I don’t know what psychological phenomenon it is but everywhere we look there it is. And hey, what’s right at the start of this song but *THAT NUMBER*. Anyway, mandolins are really fun! It feels a little dry in the mix or maybe the hard left panning is doing it a disservice in the mix, I’m not sure what to recommend there. I record mine simultaneously with its built-in pickup and a microphone to get it to fill out the stereo a bit better and it seems to work?. I like the synth washes going on in the prechorus and I wish there were more of them! <space solo> sounded nice. Would like to hear a bit more build up going into the chorus, but if half the band was stuck on a road trip while recording this I get it! I like the lyrical themes going on here.
Bubba & The Ghost of the Kraken - What on earth kind of idea is it to write a peppy number with a hint of funk…about BATHORY of all people, goodness gracious what a terrible figure from history. There’s this thing you do where it feels like you’re periodically inserting a beat or two and that deviation from the strict 4/4 grid really keeps this compelling. The vocals get a little hard to understand around the “lord please watch over the souls of these ladies”, maybe some eq-ing or just a volume boost could really bring them out? I wish the melody of this had more notes in it. I feel like spend most of the song just hitting the same 2 or 3 notes and it starts to feel…one note after awhile? Moving around your vocal range more would have made this a lot more compelling, though a tale of that horrible person is indeed compelling in its own way.
Ironbark - You’re so very new at cello and I know that cello – and really most fretless instruments – are a pain in the butt to learn how to play properly. Probably a safe bet that your cello part is about as simple as it gets. What all instruments are even in this? I hear a banjo, a synthesizer, some drums. There’s a few bowed high notes where you get into higher territory and I kind of forget its a cello for a bit. Oh there’s a piano! And now triplets! What is that ending, it just…stops? Anyway, this was fun in a twee sort of way. I don’t know if it reached the heights you set for yourself in the previous rounds – not much here really grabbed me melodically? I was starting to have a lot of fun with the changeups to the overall song you were adding, so if you revisit this maybe speed it up a little and really dive into the quirky side of this track cause it’s there and just begging to be emphasised!
Cavedwellers - By far the most infectious part of this song is the guitar production and the dueling harmonies which is precisely the part you said was new to you. So A+ on this. What kind of guitar pedal are you using for that shimmery chorus sound? It’s divine and I want it. It sounds kind of like my Dimension C but I don’t think it’s that? Guitar solo after the second verse is so very abrupt and I wish there was at least a little more transition into it? But that doesn’t mean I don’t like it, ugh I like this stereo doubled guitar sound a lot! Yeah, the transitions in this song are all very abrupt, so I feel like I have to ding it for that I guess but…ugh, those guitars, yum. Is it weird that I simultaneously love the guitar playing on this song while not really finding the song itself compelling? Oh man those guitars sound good.
Phlub - It’s me. I already said a whole lot about this song in its bio. But I didn’t mention that I’m planning on getting a tattoo of a chickadee here soon as a tribute to my dad, the great “chickadee Bob” who legitimately loved the little birds. So hopefully that’ll turn out well.
Jealous Brother - Harmoniums to me sound like a combination of a melodica and an accordion but I know they’re really something else all together. This tune starts to pick up steam as it gets on, and I like the way that it progresses. I find the start of it a bit slow. That ascending line into the guitar with “so dry” is cool, and I start really digging the instrumental. The long instrumental break really is a joy to listen to, and the chord progression is sublime. I will say that for whatever reason the vocal parts of this don’t really grab me at all – they aren’t bad, maybe it’s just my mood - and I find myself wishing that it was just a really groovy instrumental! But that outro I could have on loop for an hour and be fine.
Tunes By LJ - This song sounds like something that would be playing at that hip coffee shop. Y’know, the one with the big potted ferns by the door and the art deco posters on the wall. House influences are really working and whatever EP setting you have going is a great choice sonically. I can’t say that I really noticed the key change all that much, largely because G and C are so close together harmonically anyway, so rather than thinking “wow an unexpected key change” it’s more like “wow, this is really smooth”, which given the genre is probably exactly what you want. Vocals sound great. This sounds like it was really fun to write. So chill.
Governing Dynamics - I’m a sucker for slide guitar playing and so this naturally grabbed my attention from the start. Even whether or not this is truly 9/8 – I would have just called it ¾ based on the way that it grabs my ear – this gets a pass just for learning slide guitar which often sounds like a sloppy mess in the wrong hands! Very mellow, and I like the way this moves. Production is great, and every time that slide comes in I’m satisfied. There’s one point near the end on the slide guitar you hit a note kind of flat but it winds up coming closer to a just major third whether you intended to or not so thanks for the microtonal moment cause it sounded good whether or not you intended it to.
Temnere - Interesting results on the drums! I thought this was live but there’s a couple moments that give it away, mainly the quick drum fills on the snare which never have that sharp of an attack in real life. I’m completely unfamiliar with your reference material…searching curta’n wall juts got me to a bunch of picture of architecture and I don’t think that was what you were intending. Very fun to listen to. There’s that guitar stab you do at various points that has this slapback reverb on it but I feel like it would sound a little bit better if you took the delay off of it just a little bit.
Cybronica - The tempo changes are nice and unexpected, as are the concurrent meter changes. Happy to hear more mandolin popping up here! There are some moments where I think you could benefit from some vocal compression. Like in the runup to “writing this song” your voice kind of gets lost in the mix. There’s some timing issues with the instrumental that are quite audible but for learning a new instrument it is totally understandable! Maybe some more workshopping would take this from good to great.
Sober - Naturally a sad topic to write about but the ever present emotions in your singing carry it as well as one could so A+ there. The first time I heard this my brain immediately latched on to a few notes that were a bit flat in the bass – but then I saw that you were playing fretless for the first time and it all made a bit more sense. I couldn’t figure out which string was out of tune! Stomp/clap is well done. There’s something about the way that the clap sits in the mix – the reverb on it seems to have a bit more treble, I’d back off of the reverb and use a setting for a slightly larger room with more high end dampening. Beyond that I don’t have anything to complain about really!
Chewmeupspitmeout - I’m going to admit something – I asked chatgpt to write me lyrics about chickadees about 4 times and used some of the couplets that were output to guide me along the way. I didn’t do the whole song like that – the chorus was all me! The resultant images you got in this song definitely have some power but as predicted this doesn’t quite gel into a coherent narrative. But I wouldn’t expect it to. Compositionally this builds pretty well. Mix is a little bit muddy in places, like there’s too much low mids. Still haunting like most of your other songs, which is always a plus for me!
Hot Pink Halo - Reading about your endeavors made me want to refret my mandolin, but then I thought about it and I didn’t want to do anything to my sweet baby so maybe I’ll just save up for another one. I’m not 100% sure what your lyrics are about, but they provide a nice enough vessel for your instrumental and ukelele prowess! I’m not entirely sure what to criticize about this. It’s pleasant! You’ve written more engaging songs before but you’ve never refretted your ukelele for them!
Mandrake - I think your biggest weakness from a songwriting standpoint is that your vocals are never mixed very well. They’re all muffled and I can’t understand what you’re saying! Maybe some more breath support – though you inhaled half of these so that advice is probably worthless haha. Try high passing your vocal tracks. There’s a lot of low mids in your synth and drum production so it’s all kind of competing for space. I was trying to count this and kept getting lost. What tuning system did you use? We’re clearly in xenspace but I didn’t catch the tuning. The bleep bloops were excellently bleep bloop and blooped really well.
"There's a lot to be said about a full-on frontal assault on the ear drums" - Pigfarmer Jr.
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Re: Spin Tunes 20 Round 3 Challenge - Self Improvement
I greatly appreciate reviewers taking time out of their busy lives to react to all these tracks, but I’m pretty sure this was a Mandibles songsleepysilverdoor wrote: ↑Sat Apr 22, 2023 9:20 amCybronica - The tempo changes are nice and unexpected, as are the concurrent meter changes. Happy to hear more mandolin popping up here! There are some moments where I think you could benefit from some vocal compression. Like in the runup to “writing this song” your voice kind of gets lost in the mix. There’s some timing issues with the instrumental that are quite audible but for learning a new instrument it is totally understandable! Maybe some more workshopping would take this from good to great.
#justiceforjawbones