Nur Ein IX Round Zero "Full of Courage"

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Re: Nur Ein IX- Round Zero

Post by Niveous » Wed Apr 23, 2014 2:46 pm

Please note that my comment came from listening to Caravan's song with my wife. She was enjoying it quite a bit, then came the bridge.

Me, I still found it hilarious. I can do without getting vomiting in my ears but skull fuck jokes are amusing.

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Re: Nur Ein IX- Round Zero

Post by BenKrieger » Wed Apr 23, 2014 4:54 pm

This guy, plus Starship Troopers, plus Are You Lonesome Tonight = Nur Ein non-gold
As a huge fan of the music of the man behind LWA, this is actually one of my favorite songs in the round in concept and feel. However, I think it could use another draft, if only because I feel like the Starship Trooper references didn't start until the second verse and were inserted like a punchline for fans of the movie. This works well for one pass because it's clever, but I think it hurts this draft in the long run. On subsequent listens, the first verse doesn't grab me. If it makes any sense, I think the song would be stronger if it was written within the Starship Troopers universe, and the writer was crafting it to resonate with listeners in that fictional "mankind" from the get-go, and not the Nur Ein listeners. A bit more (fictional) earnestness, a little less clever intent. I could be totally wrong about how you went about writing this, but it doesn't change the fact that once I knew the song, I skipped ahead a few times so I could hear the spoken bridge, which I really love.

The first example that springs to mind is "The Bravest" by Tom Paxton, which is about 9/11, and slaps you across the face from the start with imagery from line 1.

[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6UdP5fWCYjg[/youtube]
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Re: Nur Ein IX- Round Zero

Post by josh » Wed Apr 23, 2014 5:52 pm

Cool, wasn't expecting to get reviews on this one. Thanks. Figured I'd return the favor... P.S. Couldn't submit because I was over the smile limit. Sorry, for some reason I smile a lot. Haha. Went around and deleted randomly to fix, so just know, even if I'm tearing into something in your song, I'm probably doing it with a grin on!

Adam Adamant: I like the way the bassline works with the chords. Somehow adds a slight edge. The bridge comes a bit abrupt. I like the reed thing. Concertina? Melodica? Can't tell. It's weird, I've played a lot of ukulele and would probably use one on my tracks if I had one, but I tend not to like them when I hear others recordings. Haha. I think it's because they've been used so much recently.

Balance Lost: The first time I heard that spoken bridge I laughed my ass off. A little meta, but funny. I think the earlier comment is fitting though. It sort of takes away from the serious tone of the rest of the song. But it's a good song. Lots of interesting parts, well executed. Everything fits neatly together. To my ears it's mixed very well. Nice pop-y hook.

Buffo Yux Dudes: Not the best excecution vocally, but the lyrics are great. Lots of gems "Like Jimmie the Greek but even greeker" and of course "He makes a big splash and he makes the big cash"

Callipeva: I still haven't heard the full version. It sounds like it can be a nice track. Your voice sounds pretty good. I just don't think it makes sense to submit completely unaccomponied tracks. How about harmonizing with yourself? Also your profile seems to imply that you have some instruments. Even some simple chords in the background would add something.

CaveDwellers: Cool synth sounds. I love the tone on the spoken bridge. Solid song. The only complaint I have is that it does have a bit of a generic pop feel at times.

Chocolate Chips: Feels like a mix of New Wave and 90's electronica and who knows what else. I'm not all that crazy about vocoder vocals, but I still like the song a lot. Cool changes and all the instruments have a nice tone. The bridge is great. Creepy as heck. Reminds me of the intro to "Threshhold of a Dream" by Moody Blues.

Cookie Blue: On all your tracks I've heard you get a lot of emotion in. You put your vocals right out front and they generally sound good, but there's some roughness around the edges that can be distracting. Cool accent.

DJ Ranger Den: Great voice and feel. Very loungy. Cool lyrics, too. I'm not all that crazy with the pseudo record sounds. The idea is interesting, but it just doesn't quite sound like a record player and is too up front. Awesome bridge, too! "I'm a tiny effective serial killer". Cats are cute, but good lord they are little bastards.

Ghost Pup: Tracks like this are more fun to make then they are to listen to.

Inflatable Vegetables: Gotta say, the lofi vocal sounds don't fit well with the simple drum machine sounds. I think you would have done better doing them straight. Catchy song. Cool guitar riffs.

Ken Mahru: When a song is vocally driven it puts a lot of attention on the lyrics, but this just seems to be a string of cliches. Still, it's pretty nice musically.

Kraut Kitten: Yup, nailed it. Haha. I never would have expected the judges to go for it, but I'm glad they did.

Levittdown: Watch the levels! The digital clipping is really distracting. Not sure if that turned me of it, but never really connected with the song.

Ligers with Attitude: Umm... Ligers with Attitude doesn't rhyme with Niggaz Wit Attitudes (NWA)! Very pretty song. Great harmonies. Recording sounds really nice. Was about to say doing soldier songs seems a little hackneyed, but it's finally dawning on me that this is about Starship Troopers. That's pretty funny! Put two and two together after hearing the aracnids line. Haha.

Manhattan Glutton: I'm guessing your a POTSOA fan :-) I like the drum sounds. The ending feels a little forced to me.

Merisan: Great guitar sounds. Very catchy pop/country sounds. My only critisizm would be similar to CaveDwellers. At times it sounds too much like a standard pop song. But it's an impressive submission.

Nick M. Soma: I donno, I've never been a fan of the slacker delivery (Okay, I really like Dinosaur Jr., sorry for lying). Or pop punk (Okay, I was a big Greenday fan, sorry for lying). Haha. But, overall I do think it's a solid recording. I'm constantly impressed by how good the productions sound on these week long recordings.

Paco Del Stinko: I love the lyrics on this and the aggressive, off kiltered feel. I think this is my favorite for Round 0.

Pig Farmer Jr.: "Pull out your sword and slash it around. Impress all the girls this house has done found"... Is that a penis euphemism. Haha.

Rabid Garfunkel: I would prefer way less reverb. The bridge is the hightlight of the song.

Ross Durand: I wasn't alone in immediately thinking of booze when I heard the title :-)

The Tydon Docks: Great story. I actually liked this one as soon as I read the lyrics before I'd heard it. Cool flute sounds. Plus... skull fucking :-)

Zack Facco: Sounds a bit phoned in and not well recorded. I especially think the bridge came off half assed. While I don't think the vocals are nailed, I gotta say, this is about as good as I can sing right now. Haha. And it's in the stronger part of my range. I like the song idea and some of the lyrics are pretty funny.
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Re: Nur Ein IX- Round Zero

Post by RangerDenni » Thu Apr 24, 2014 12:32 pm

thanks for all these reviews and comments - particularly Carlo as I know it took special language-navigation effort. I got something helpful out of all the feedback as well. :)
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Re: Nur Ein IX- Round Zero

Post by ken » Thu Apr 24, 2014 1:17 pm

Agreed. I really appreciate the judges reviews, which I am taking to heart. I already decided to use a capo on this week's song to put it in a better range for my voice.
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Re: Nur Ein IX- Round Zero

Post by Pigfarmer Jr » Thu Apr 24, 2014 5:29 pm

Generic wrote: Pigfarmer Jr.
I had a conversation with you about an hour before I got around to listening to this, and you seemed quick to make excuses: "Oh, I was just experimenting with this new recording method, I didn't have much time," etc. Were you trying to lower my expectations? If so, mission accomplished. This is perfectly lovely. You may think it's a "mic fart" entry, but this is easily in the top half for me. Could be a bit shorter and not be any worse for it, but the performance of both the guitar and vocals are on-point, confident, and appropriate. Other people did songs I enjoyed more this round, but I see nothing wrong with this.
Okay, for the record: 1) I don't try to influences judges. Stop talking to me if you judge shit. 2) A hand held recorder and the first time I played the song through start to finish may sound like an excuse, but it's the truth. Thanks for all the encouragement.

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Re: Nur Ein IX- Round Zero

Post by Caravan Ray » Thu Apr 24, 2014 5:36 pm

ken wrote:I already decided to use a capo on this week's song to put it in a better range for my voice.
Last week I played at a pub (the "pub down on Russell St" as it happens, as mentioned in my song) - and my guitar had a flat battery, so I borrowed another blokes. And he had it in standard tuning, but tuned a half tone done. It was great! Suddenly, all these songs I sang 10 years ago, but now find myself struggling with - came back into range again! One's voice does deepen somewhat as one ages.
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Re: Nur Ein IX- Round Zero

Post by Manhattan Glutton » Thu Apr 24, 2014 5:41 pm

Huh. The whole reason I tune a half-step down is so I don't have to lend anyone my guitar. That guy's doing it wrong.
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Re: Nur Ein IX- Round Zero

Post by Billy's Little Trip » Thu Apr 24, 2014 7:32 pm

Caravan Ray wrote:he had it in standard tuning, but tuned a half tone done. It was great! Suddenly, all these songs I sang 10 years ago, but now find myself struggling with - came back into range again! One's voice does deepen somewhat as one ages.
I refuse to step down my tuning, the same way I refuse to now wear reading glasses!

....it has nothing to do with the fact that I now have to throw the newspaper on the floor to read it and that my singing has gone from angelic to le' suck. It's the world, it's changing. I blame global warming, cuz I'm still the same goddam it! :(

Maybe I'll look into reading glasses and down tuning so I can "evolve" into global warming.
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Re: Nur Ein IX- Round Zero

Post by Caravan Ray » Thu Apr 24, 2014 8:17 pm

Billy's Little Trip wrote:
Caravan Ray wrote:he had it in standard tuning, but tuned a half tone done. It was great! Suddenly, all these songs I sang 10 years ago, but now find myself struggling with - came back into range again! One's voice does deepen somewhat as one ages.
I refuse to step down my tuning, the same way I refuse to now wear reading glasses!

....it has nothing to do with the fact that I now have to throw the newspaper on the floor to read it and that my singing has gone from angelic to le' suck. It's the world, it's changing. I blame global warming, cuz I'm still the same goddam it! :(

Maybe I'll look into reading glasses and down tuning so I can "evolve" into global warming.
You will probably find that your voice changes a bit when you reach puberty Billy
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Re: Nur Ein IX- Round Zero

Post by RangerDenni » Fri Apr 25, 2014 10:21 am

don't feel too bad, Chris. The Psychotics sound like children anyway because when I aged I lost my nice throaty blues voice and became 12. :)

(ps. for what it's worth, I thought your vocal was awesome this week, Ken. I guess I have to finish my partial reviews now that I was dabbling with, dammit. I have 3 more. They're short too. I'll try and finish today.)
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Re: Nur Ein IX- Round Zero

Post by Levittdown » Sun Apr 27, 2014 9:31 am

Taking a lunch break before finishing up my submission, just wanted to thank the judges and others for their feedback. It's been a long time since I've done much recording and I thought my "Full of Courage" was ok as a song and painful as a performance/recording. I wouldn't have much to add to the reviews that have already been posted, there were a great number of really great songs, color me impressed!
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Re: Nur Ein IX- Round Zero

Post by Mysteria » Sun Apr 27, 2014 7:45 pm

Sorry I didn’t finish these earlier in the week, but here are my comments regarding the Round Zero entries.

I sometimes feel like I am at a disadvantage not knowing all the competitors to the same degree most of the other judges do but I recognize this is also an advantage as I have no preconceived notions about what anyone’s music “should be” and everything is just fresh and new (even if I remember you from last year’s Nur Ein).

That being said, please know even if I do not like a particular entry I still: (i) respect the work that went into it and; (ii) consider this to be a work of art which not everyone can create. My comments are meant to give some insight into how I judged a song for the round and if you take something constructive away then that is up to you and wonderful. If you want to read my comments and just say decide I’m full of flannel, which works too. Last but not least, thank you for letting me into your world for a few weeks. I really enjoyed last year's competition and am excited to be back again this year.

Adam Adamant – I enjoyed this song. I liked the underscored spoken bridge and the rhythmic cadence of the song itself; I found it to be melodic and mildly haunting with the ukulele and synthesized drum backup. Vocals sounded a touch strained in some instances on holding longer notes so I would suggest working on breathing a little bit more but I would listen to this again.

Balance Lost – This was a catchy tune melodically and drew me in right away. I thought the first, announced spoken word bridge was a cute fake out moment. At times the vocals were a little too layered together and that made it a little difficult to follow the story but not impossible. My suggestion would be making a slightly clearer delineation between foreground and background vocals.

Boffo Yux Dudes – I liked the guitars and the tune on this song but found the “do, do, dos” a little distracting. I also think I would have liked it more lyrically if there was a stronger link to Jack needing to be full of courage because at present he comes across more in a position of self-loathing but it isn’t clear that it is from the lack of courage and as a result, I wasn’t looking for him to grow a pair so much as I was just annoyed by him.

Calliopeva – Due to technical difficulties it was impossible to really give you a true ranking and review. However, from the bit I could hear, the vocals are clean and a full a capella effort would not have been unwelcome (although I do wonder if that can hold up week after week).

Cavedwellers – This song was one of my favorites of the week. I loved the bass line and thought the guitars were solid on this song. Vocals are clean and I thought the lyrics were well-written. This is a song to be added to my playlist.

Chocolate Chips – I thought this song was creatively done, if not to my personal taste. The synthesized/robotic sounding spoken word bridge worked for the song.

Cookie Blue – This song was a little bit “eh” for me. I do not mind pure acoustic accompaniment, but this song just left me wanting and waiting for a bit more “that moment”, so to speak. I would also suggest watching the long higher vocal notes as they can sometimes go a little sour in the listener’s ear, perhaps the way to correct for this is to be at a slightly lower volume on those notes.

DJ Ranger Den – There was an element of showtune for me with this number which can be right up my alley. That it’s starring a cat is even better in my book. I really enjoyed this song, again one of my favorites of the week. I found it to be original, creative, fun, different and something I had no problem relating to, having once had a cat that I just know was plotting world domination while I was at work every day.

Ghost Pup – My problem with this song was that it felt like the whole thing was spoken, not just the bridge. There were a couple of guitar parts that I liked and would have liked to have heard more of, but overall it was just a little too much of the high pitched tones for me.

Inflatable Vegetables – I liked this song, the sound caught my attention right from the beginning. The recording itself sounded slightly muddied and I would suggest cleaning it up a little more but it was still understandable and enjoyable.

Ken Mahru – I enjoyed the keyboards on this song. I also liked that the courage in this particular song had to do with the everyday routine of life. Musically, I enjoyed the song more when the tune picked up a bit and found it overall to be a touch too slow in tempo for my taste.

Kraut Kitten – Yes! This was hysterical and creative to submit an ad jingle for this round. It evoked images of a Wrigley’s chewing gum style commercial in my mind which made it even funnier for me, and the actual ad content and “snort responsibly” tagline only added to the comic genius – well done.

Levittdown - This was an enjoyable tune, I found it to be catchy and fun. I liked the background vocals and thought the harmonizing was very smooth. I would have liked to hear a little more of that in the song.

Ligers With Attitude – The Starship Troopers angle was a nice touch, although I would have liked to see it come in a tiny bit earlier and maybe have one or two more references. The background vocals underscored the song nicely.

Manhattan Glutton – This was catchy and fun, a move with the groove even sitting at your desk so you look a little odd to people passing by song. I really liked the bass that underscored the spoken word bridge. This is one for my playlist.

Merisan – I haven’t got much to say about this beyond a simply beautiful song. I could listen to this over and over again (and likely will).

Nick Soma – There was a great vibe and sound to this tune that I really enjoyed. The only thing I wasn’t too keen on were the choral “na, na, na, na, na, nas” but that’s a minor preference thing.

Paco del Stinko – Another of my favorites for the week, solid performance, I am calling this “chainsaw rock” – its hardcore, full of power and I’m a fan.

Pigfarmer Jr – I thought the guitar was pretty on this song although not loud enough under the vocals. This song is one that has been growing on me with each listen and I do not dislike it, it just wasn’t one that stood out enough initially for me or that caught me instantly in order to rank higher.

Rabid Garfunkel – I liked that you chose to meet the challenge in not one but two languages - that got you a bonus point or two with me for a creative twist. I also thought the acoustic work was pretty and the lyrics clever. Overall, I enjoyed this song. I would suggest that you tone the echo on your vocals down just a touch to make it a little cleaner but it wasn’t overpowering/distracting.

Ross Durand – I thought this was a good tune with very clean, catchy, beautiful acoustic work. Vocals were clear and lyrics were well paced. I would suggest lengthening the song a bit to add in a little more instrumental guitar.

The Tydon Docks –This was a fun, dirty, shanty drinking song. Yeah! There was a great folk/pub vibe to it and I was very much enjoying it up until the earful of vomit (I listen to most these songs at work with earphones all day long during the judging/reviewing period, so yak in the ear is yuck). My only suggestion would be it’s okay to imply vomit, but no need to supply vomit.

Vincent Von F – The vocals were hard to hear for me on this one, which is a shame because the melody was different and I was enjoying it. Unfortunately, because I could tell there were vocals and this was not a purely instrumental tune, it was frustrating to have to keep turning up my volume in order to hear the words and you lost points as a result. I would definitely suggesting turning up the volume on your vocals in the future.

Zack Facco – I liked the lyrics on this song but the speak-singing wasn’t working for me although I was able to differentiate between the verses and the actual challenge element since the bridge was truly spoken. The guitar was a touch too twangy for me when mixed with the vocals, although I think Niv’s suggestion of a chest voice would pay off nicely here.
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Re: Nur Ein IX- Round Zero

Post by Rabid Garfunkel » Sun Apr 27, 2014 8:49 pm

Mysteria wrote:Rabid Garfunkel – I liked that you chose to meet the challenge in not one but two languages - that got you a bonus point or two with me for a creative twist. I also thought the acoustic work was pretty and the lyrics clever. Overall, I enjoyed this song. I would suggest that you tone the echo on your vocals down just a touch to make it a little cleaner but it wasn’t overpowering/distracting.
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Re: Nur Ein IX Round Zero "Full of Courage"

Post by glennny » Fri Jan 04, 2019 8:05 pm

https://youtu.be/sukV3clx1FM

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